This is slightly off-topic, but I think people just don't say Thank You anymore. Over the past 3 years or so i can count on one hand the number of thank you's (verbal or cards) that I have received from weddings, showers, graduations, etc. I took photographs for a friends wedding, developed them, made an album, etc. I spent a bunch of money and time on them, didn't charge anything and didn't get a thank you. I don't think it is so much of a reflection of lack of appreciation as it as a lack of ettiquette. I am lucky, I guess. I have made quilts for most of the grandkids and their purpose was to be drug around and loved on. Didn't expect thank yous. I have made quilts for 2 of the adult daughters and both of them do appreciate the quilts. My mom loved hers and raves about it constantly. However, I have only made two for outside the family and, you guessed it, no thank you email, phone call, card, carrier pigeon, smoke signal. Sigh. I feel your pain, but don't give up. You love making them and someday the light will go on and they will realize what a treasure you gave them. (((Hugs))))

Reading the responses makes me think of the book The Five Love Languages. Some people speak love through giving gifts. For others, recieving them isn't a big thing. I know I fall into the latter catergory. To me, as a quilter, the gift I would notice and love would be the time put into the quilt, not the quilt itself. But I am a quilter, and I know how much work goes into one. I guess some people just don't appreciate recieving or sending gifts, and that is really ok. Unless the person specifically asked for one, I wouldn't be hurt by a lack of reception. Just know you sent it from your heart, and you really may never know just how appreciated it is.

It's like someone else said -- "They just don't get it." We can't begrudge them for that. I certainly don't do it for the "thanks" but it really makes my heart sing when someone does appreciate it. My favorite thanks was when our SIL told my DD that he just couldnt believe that I had done something like that just for him. I had made a t-shirt quilt using all of their company logo shirts from years past and present.

Another special thanks is when the grandkids come to spend the night carrying their much loved/worn quilts that Mimi made (or when I see their quilt tossed on the floor next to a pillow -- I know they've been taking a nap with it.).

I take a piece of plain fabric like muslin, iron it to freezer paper, write using a fine point permanent marker like Sharpie ultra fine. I include the name of the recipient, date, occasion, my name as the quilter. Sometimes I just put the name of the pattern, date completed (month and year at least) and my name. My first machine quilted quilt with feathers has a label that reads "First Feathers" the date & my name. Years from now I have a record of when I started doing feathers and I'll see my progress. I set this label in a corner on the backside of the quilt before I complete the binding. Tear off the freezer paper, Turn under two edges and applique then finish the binding over the other two edges. I wish I had done this from the start. I have quilts I made probably 20 or so years ago but I don't know for sure because I didn't label them.
Hope this helps explain it.

That is beautiful. God bless. Penny

My friend made a baby quilt several years ago and when she went to see the baby..... it was being used as a doggie blanket..... she is an excellent quilter and was really hurt. I agree, most people do not realize the time and cost of making a quilt....that is also true of any hand made gift.... sad but true

I can usually tell how the recipient feels about my quilt because I make sure to give it to them in person. I do try to make sure they see me hand quilting on it and some will be told at some point but others won't have a clue until the day I present it to them and regardless of the time they first see the quilt, the faces light up and I mean light up. The eyes open wide in amazement and get a happy sparkle to them and the smiles just light up the room. When they get it, every single person has sat down right then with the quilt to look it over very carefully, touching and gently stroking the quilt. You truly can see the awe on their faces and that my quilt definitely touched their hearts. It's a heart warming experience and that quite often is the only thanks I'll get because although they can get questions out asking about the quilt, the words "thank you" are NOT always stated but I will hear "it's so beautiful, you do a wonderful job of quilting, I can see why you enjoy your quilting so much, it's perfect, you've made me feel so special," etc, etc, etc. With many you really can see they are choked up and emotional about the gift of a quilt as most have never had such a gift before. I make the quilt with love and gift it to them. Sometimes I will hear a few years later, from the recipient or someone close to them, how very much my quilt is treasured and how touched the recipient was so I feel the quilt is very worth the effort and love of making and presenting it. Being a hand quilter, my quilts to give are well spaced due to the time of making them so they are usually very loved and appreciated. I do know some who've gotten frustrated and disgusted with Mothers and grandmothers who are very prolific machine quilters and give them more quilts than they can use and store. I feel badly for all them but it appears the reality here is the quilts ARE LOVED but they don't want too many of them. As a hand quilter spreading my quilts among 14 immediate family members, each one has to wait their turn and are very eager for when that time comes.

Most of the ladies I know who are machine quilters and have overwhelmed their families with too many quilts now only give them quilts for very special occasions and the rest are now being made for charity use which allows them to be as prolific as they wish with the knowledge that their quilts are loved, used, and cherished. Yes, they do feel hurt and disappointment when their family members say "no more quilts as you've made me enough already."

I feel the same way plus I offer to repair if it's ever needed and so far, only 4 or 5 have needed mending.

I agree and most of them just plain don't appreciate or want anything that is hand crafted. In their minds, store bought is better. They truly would prefer a quilt purchased from Cracker Barrel or some other store than one hand crafted and it's truly their loss. The decor of their homes totally show this too as they tend to be homes without warmth and missing really personal items. Just my opinion.

But those words indicate she had been eagerly waiting for you to complete her quilt and being 8, that was her thank you.

Years ago I made a quilt for our oldest niece's first child. I asked my sister in law (the grandmother) first if she was going to be making the child a quilt and was told no so I figured it would be ok to go ahead and make the quilt. The Mom was thrilled to get the quilt but I was scolded by my mother in law for making that baby a quilt - scolded. I had initially planned to make a baby quilt for every new baby that a niece or nephew blessed the family with but never made another one after that. I still don't understand why I was scolded for it. My sister in law and the Mom were thrilled that I did. Another time, my husband's aunt asked me to help her complete a quilt she started when she was a very young child, under 10 for sure, but the time never allowed us to get together to complete the quilt. She was fighting for her life with cancer and I got this strong feeling that if that quilt was going to finished, I needed to go ahead an do it and with working full time, it took me 2 full years to complete and we presented it to them and it happened to be on their 50th anniversary which we didn't know until they told us that day. Both his aunt and uncle were so thrilled and so touched that I had completed the quilt and today, she has since passed on, the daughter has the quilt in her home on the guest room bed where it is still treasured and honored. Again, my mother in law scolded me telling me I had no business finishing that quilt like did - I wonder if she was jealous. At that point in our lives, we obviously didn't get along very well but we do now. My inlaws always disapproved of my sewing. Having grown up in the depression, having store bought things are more meaningful to them. Having "home made items" is embarrassing and almost insulting and a sign of shame. I did make each of them beautiful throws which they did use for years. They recently sold most of their things and moved into a retirement living situation where they move up through the levels of care and I have no clue what became of those quilts. I would have loved to have had them back but never asked for them. When we were invited to view the items in their basement to take whatever we wanted, the quilts weren't there so I don't know if they kept them or gave them to one of the other kids and I don't want to ask. Perhaps one day we'll find out and perhaps not and it's ok either way. Since they were giving all of us back the gifts we'd given them over the years, I kind of assume they have them with them even though I didn't see them in their apartment but I also wasn't nosy when given the tour.

Every new baby should have a pretty new quilt for use when they are on the floor and babies love to lie and roll and check out the colors and pieces and pictures on new quilts. It doesn't hurt them. I did daycare in my home for 29 years and whenever a baby and I were on the floor playing, one of my quilts was under the baby. I and other daycare children would sit on that quilt and play with the baby. It was a wonderful, loving time AND those babies grew very attached to that play quilt and as they grew, that was ALWAYS the quilt that child wanted to use at nap time. I agree with that mother. What better use for a baby quilt and one you want to be loved and treasured. Trust me, that child will favor that quilt over the fancy one in the crib because that floor quilt will have more happy memories of playing and having fun.

I'd say it says a lot that they used your quilt to photograph the babies one - a very big thank you indeed but without the actual words. If they didn't like and appreciate the quilt, you can bet the babies pictures would not have been taken with your quilt anywhere in sight. They were honoring you in their own way with their precious babies.

Wow, your quilt is beautiful. I bet it comes out on cold evenings and they snuggle under it to watch TV together or perhaps it's used on a bed under the bedspread. I'm sure your son loves and appreciates your quilt. I know my son does but his wife won't let him use the quilts I've given him. She loves the quilts I make but doesn't want to wear them out so they don't get a lot of use. She and my daughter (best friends) actually got into a fight at a family gather over the use of the quilts. My daughter's family uses their quilts (hard use and abuse) but they love my quilts and those are the few I've had to do some minor mending on. I personally would prefer they be used and loved but sure can't argue with my daughter in law's philosophy either. I had to intervene that day to preserve their friendship and told them that they are both right. I also stated my preference is that they be used even if they do wear out but I also can't argue with a loved daughter in law who treasures my quilts to the point where she wants her children to know and appreciate my quilts, love them enough to keep them as heirlooms to be passed down through the generations. That's also a bit hard to argue with. When my daughter's quilts are worn out and gone, my son's children will have quilts to inherit.

Whilst it is VERY hurtful I would not want a quilt for a bed as I always have matching bedcovers/spreads over the duvet to match curtains ,but woul Love a gift of single size/large lap quilt --that would be SO GOOD but I fear no one will do one for me so make my own and sell the rest for www.englishtoyspanielrescue.
Try not to feel too hurt, they are obviously ungrateful philistines!!

My husband knows how hard I work on my quilts, so when I made a quilt for my MIL, he called her ahead of time to make sure she knew how hard I worked on it. The younger genereation is not always so good at sending thank you's, but if I know they are using and loving the quilt, that's okay with me.

I made a very cute dog rag quilt that was not easy to make and was expensive for some dear friends because she thought mine was cute. I made it for her to put on her wall in the baby's room as mine is hanging in my sewing room.
Well I was dog sitting and went into her home and peaked into the baby's room to see how it looked on the wall beings I put wall hangers on it but found it all tucked around the matress in the crib. :evil: You couldn't even tell what it was. The baby had been sleeping on it and soiled it and Ohhhhh was I upset.
They had another baby recently and guess what. I made nothing for them. Nor will I ever. I'm glad I took pictures of it beings I'll never see it again. And your right about some people not understanding the time and effort and cost that goes into our works of art. I know I've made stuff for people though that do appreciate what I've done so that kind of makes up for it. :wink:

This has happened to me. I gave one to my daughter for grandchild. Comment was "Oh how cute" and then put it on the table. People constantly ask me to make quilts and expect them to be done in a week or 2. They have no concept of the time and effort into making a quilt.

Part of that is because there are ladies who can turn them out that quickly. I sure can't. My quilts are strictly reserved for family with very few exceptions made and then only for special people who know my work well and I know will appreciate and love a quilt and who will realize that they are close enough to me to be considered family.

i made a baby quilt for someone and handed it to her husband so i knew she had recieved it. i never heard a word from her about it. or from her mom even when we were talking quilts and i refused to ask-it's like digging for compliments. but several months later we were both at a baby shower and i had made a quilt for the gift and she was using the quilt i had made for her son. in the conversation she said it was her faorite. i've come to the conclusion that some people don't write thank you notes-period. i make them because i want to and if they don't like it then tough!