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Thread: To stay or go...Applique Bee

  1. #76
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    You and the other gal start a group of your own.

  2. #77
    Super Member Sheree from Chicago's Avatar
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    Sounds more like a "stitch & bitch" than applique bee!

  3. #78
    Senior Member ShirlR's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rosemary krupski
    I would probably leave BUT if you decide to stay, sit near the hostess where you can learn something. I don't know about you but when I am concentrating on something, I can pretty well block out everything around me. If the hostess is quiet most of the time, you two would make a good sewing pair. Good luck on your decision.
    I agree with Rosemary, I would probably leave, but her advice to sit near the hostess sounds like a good plan if you want to give your final decision a little more time.

  4. #79
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    Quote Originally Posted by MellieKQuilter
    I say stop going. Negativity begets negativity... why not host something in your own home once a month? This way you can invite the few that are pleasant and helpful (and worl on your own but get help during this time), and you all can help each other at this event
    . Make it a Saturday Social or something, and keep it small and enjoyable. I would bet the others would love it! :) Just keep in mind, no complaining about the other ladies. Start fresh and keep this POSITIVE. :)
    Great advise!!!

  5. #80
    Super Member mar32428's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by susie-susie-susie
    It seems to me that you will loose nothing if you bring it up the the hostess/organizer. It sounds like she is getting fed up with the complaining since she is usually so quiet at the meetings. If I am wrong, you will loose nothing since you are ready to quit anyway. Then you can begin another group and eliminate the complainers/nasty ladies. There was no excuse for that person to jump all over you that way. Good luck, and speak up for yourself. It's not worth the agrivation just to improve your applique.
    Sue
    Had the same problem with my ASG group. Always whining and complaining. I finally stood up one meeting ans told them how I felt and unless things changed, I would not be back. Then a couple of others echoed my feelings. Things are a lot different now and happier. Sometimes it helps to speak out.

  6. #81
    Senior Member Joan Gaddis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MellieKQuilter
    I say stop going. Negativity begets negativity... why not host something in your own home once a month? This way you can invite the few that are pleasant and helpful (and worl on your own but get help during this time), and you all can help each other at this event. Make it a Saturday Social or something, and keep it small and enjoyable. I would bet the others would love it! :) Just keep in mind, no complaining about the other ladies. Start fresh and keep this POSITIVE. :)
    i agree with Mellie. it's no fun so why go

  7. #82
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    I don't see that you have a problem, you just need to set a priority.
    It seems these women are driving you nuts and you're allowing it in exchange for a bit of applique knowledge (which you could probably get on You Tube) or an Applique Board similar to this one.
    Either contact your hostess prior to the next meeting and, truthfully, explain why you won't be returning to the meetings; or
    Bite the bullet and continue put up with their nonsense and risk developing an ulcer.
    Keep in mind our crafts are suppose to give us pleasure; opportunities to exchange experiences and knowledge; and chances to develop new friendships. I don't see you getting much of this from this group.
    Your choice, good luck and I hope you find a more pleasant environment to practice your craft.
    Don't let these people "steal your joy"

  8. #83
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    Big thanks to everyone for their thoughts...here's an update on the situation....When the email went out asking who was attending the next Bee (which is today, actually), I sent back a short response:"Sorry I won't be there this month, hope to see you all next month." I figured I would try every other month. Also, my friend was going to talk to the organizer, but it didn't happen. By accident, I bumped into the hostess, "Susan" yesterday; she asked me if everything was okay, and jokingly asked why I wasn't going to attend. I told her that I, and my friend, were tired of many things....the one quilter who continuosly reminds the group of her food allergies,what she can't eat, how she misses eggs,milk, etc and recounts her food testing for safe alternatives.(she does this in EVERY BEE ....all 4 that she belongs to! And has been telling us for 6 months or more.) The bossy quilters who try to force their opinions, and the unhelpful quilters who have few nice things to say, but they are the only ones allowed to talk. One of them called the Gabrielle Giffords shooting "an accident" And wouldn't listen to any other opinions. I was shocked. An accident?!!! I told "Susan" that my friend and I are usually very chatty, but we both are silent during the Bee. I told her we are new to the guild and have tons of questions, but these ladies shut us down every time. So WHO are we suppose to ask? I said that I had called the guild president about me helping with quilting for others....the Bee ladies said I shouldn't bother the president.So WHO are we suppose to ask? I said that perhaps my friend and I are perceived as too young to be acceptable to interact/converse with; and who wants that to happen to them? I told "Susan" we didn't enjoy the Bee at all. "Susan" said that she sometimes felt the same way, but kept quiet. She said she would talk to the organizer. Susan also begged me not to leave the Bee. "Please come back".She must have asked 9/10 times. I told her I would think about it and to please let me know how her conversation went with the organizer. I am actually proud of myself for standing up and saying something. I felt I was clear, calm and touched all the important points. Yeah me!

  9. #84
    pal
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    Yeah you is right!!!! Now that you've stood up for yourself, keep the ball rolling. It only hurts the first time.

  10. #85
    Super Member LivelyLady's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gaevren
    Pull the ladies you DO like aside one by one and ask them for their phone numbers- say that due to a scheduling conflict you won't be able to make the Bees anymore but that you would love to keep in touch and possibly get together again.

    That way at the very least you don't lose them and you don't have to put up with the negativity anymore. And you could start your own small group if you wished.
    Very good advice :thumbup:

  11. #86
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    So glad that you were able to talk it all out. Hope things change or that you find a more up group to sew with.

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