To stay or go...Applique Bee
07-26-2011, 02:53 AM
#32
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 381
I am probably more than ten yrs older than you, So I can tell you get out. You do not need to waste your time on whine, and B........ Find you a group of women who like to eat chocolate and laugh. If you lived near me I know the very best group.
07-26-2011, 02:56 AM
#33
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 708
You say they are considerably older? I would leave, lest I become like them! I am a peacemaker naturally, but I have learned the hard way that many people enjoy their whining and don't welcome a sunnier outlook. Seek out the happy people. Maybe there is a good needlewoman in a local nursing home who would enjoy teaching you?
07-26-2011, 03:05 AM
#34
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Lancaster Pa
Posts: 514
Originally Posted by loves_2_quilt
I would stop going, don't like being around whiners and complainers all the time.
07-26-2011, 03:15 AM
#35
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Nebraska
Posts: 1,866
I would probably bow out gracefully. Then in a month or two ask the two ladies who have helped you over to see a project you are working on and desperately need their advice. Keep it on task and whatever you do, do not complain about the group. You might express to them that you so appreciate their help and miss their company. Serve them some tea (or other appropriate beverage) and thank them so much for their help. Let it go for a while and then have another problem you need their help with, after a couple times, then suggest you meet to work occasionally. If all this is kept positive, you might work into a group who will really want to sew, not complain. Good luck with this.
07-26-2011, 03:31 AM
#36
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Western North Carolina
Posts: 2,916
You already know what to do, just do it...your time and creativity are the most important issues here.
You will master the applique techniques, even if you are self taught.
Its always fun to have your favorite inspiring group of people to share your projects with and ask for constructive criticism.
post a topic for applique help here and post pics, you'll get plenty of help.
You will master the applique techniques, even if you are self taught.
Its always fun to have your favorite inspiring group of people to share your projects with and ask for constructive criticism.
post a topic for applique help here and post pics, you'll get plenty of help.
07-26-2011, 03:50 AM
#37
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,152
I have had the same problem with my Progressive Rummy Card Club. I handled it much differently than most people would have. We are all Senior Citizens where I live and "complaining and whining" used to be the topic of every meeting, whether cards or sewing club. It is OK to vent your problems a little bit, but it is also OK to stop it.
The first thing I tried was asking a question. The question: "Is out health conditions the vent of the day." Total silence. I had to do this a couple time, but now when the day starts, we all ask, "What is the vent for the day?" It takes about 5 minutes to bring up their preference. You would be surprised how soon, the venting stops. Now when some one starts, every one ignores her. It only takes a small amount of your time and thought to make a statement to change the subject. Try it, you might like it.
The first thing I tried was asking a question. The question: "Is out health conditions the vent of the day." Total silence. I had to do this a couple time, but now when the day starts, we all ask, "What is the vent for the day?" It takes about 5 minutes to bring up their preference. You would be surprised how soon, the venting stops. Now when some one starts, every one ignores her. It only takes a small amount of your time and thought to make a statement to change the subject. Try it, you might like it.
Originally Posted by Riebejamen
(hopefully this is the right spot to ask for advice!)
I belong to an Applique Bee that meets once a month at a specific member's home. The Bee moved from the quilt store, where anyone was welcome to a now limited number. I've belonged to this Bee for 2 1/2 years. All of the ladies are older than I am (10-20 years). It seems that all they do is complain and whine. And many topics are over my experience. When I made a comment about the local show and asked for opinions, I was abruptly told that "we don't discuss whining and complaints." Why is it ok for them, but not me? I also hear the same health and food allergy complaints month after month by another member. Is it my age? These women have known each other for years, and don't seem to be good friends, and everyone thinks that their version is the best. There are two members that have helped me improve my applique technique greatly. Both are award winning. I am reluctant to loose them. There haven't been any other appliquers that have helped me, except these two. One is the organizer, the other the hostess. Do I bow out and continue on my own? I really like the hostess, do I ask her how she handles the group conversations? I have no idea how she feels about the topics. She is usually very quiet during the Bees. There are two of us in the Bee that that feel this way. My friend is probably going to stop coming. I feel ignored and frustrated and surrounded by women who complain for several hours and show little interest in others. I don't know how to even bring this up to the organizer, she's shot me down a few times. I am torn, I have advice available, and I do get a few hours to focus on my current project, but do I stay or do I go? Thanks.
I belong to an Applique Bee that meets once a month at a specific member's home. The Bee moved from the quilt store, where anyone was welcome to a now limited number. I've belonged to this Bee for 2 1/2 years. All of the ladies are older than I am (10-20 years). It seems that all they do is complain and whine. And many topics are over my experience. When I made a comment about the local show and asked for opinions, I was abruptly told that "we don't discuss whining and complaints." Why is it ok for them, but not me? I also hear the same health and food allergy complaints month after month by another member. Is it my age? These women have known each other for years, and don't seem to be good friends, and everyone thinks that their version is the best. There are two members that have helped me improve my applique technique greatly. Both are award winning. I am reluctant to loose them. There haven't been any other appliquers that have helped me, except these two. One is the organizer, the other the hostess. Do I bow out and continue on my own? I really like the hostess, do I ask her how she handles the group conversations? I have no idea how she feels about the topics. She is usually very quiet during the Bees. There are two of us in the Bee that that feel this way. My friend is probably going to stop coming. I feel ignored and frustrated and surrounded by women who complain for several hours and show little interest in others. I don't know how to even bring this up to the organizer, she's shot me down a few times. I am torn, I have advice available, and I do get a few hours to focus on my current project, but do I stay or do I go? Thanks.
07-26-2011, 04:34 AM
#39
Super Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Central New Jersey
Posts: 1,013
HI
I sorta of in the same predicament, I joined a guild back in Jan 2011 - hoping to learn from seasoned quilters. So far the only thing that I see in the monthly meeting are show and tell (should be show off & tell), no one offers to show how they did something. I have not befriended anyone, I guess I come from the wrong side of town. I want to stick it out for another month, we are suppose to have a training session. I am new to quilting and there is no close places for me to take lessons, so it's been trial and error. Youtube has been a big help, as has this message board.
I sorta of in the same predicament, I joined a guild back in Jan 2011 - hoping to learn from seasoned quilters. So far the only thing that I see in the monthly meeting are show and tell (should be show off & tell), no one offers to show how they did something. I have not befriended anyone, I guess I come from the wrong side of town. I want to stick it out for another month, we are suppose to have a training session. I am new to quilting and there is no close places for me to take lessons, so it's been trial and error. Youtube has been a big help, as has this message board.
07-26-2011, 04:48 AM
#40
Super Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: PA
Posts: 2,879
Originally Posted by kraftykimberly
Just my opinion, but if it were me, I would be outta there. The cons just seem to out weigh the pros and my time is worth more to me than to spend it in a situation I dont enjoy. In the end though, its just depends on what you want to sacrifice, your valuable time or the knowledge you might gain if you did stay. I'd sacrifice the possible knowledge, but again, thats just me. Hope you figure it out, I know its frustating for you.
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
Oksewnsew
Member Swaps and Round/Row Robins
0
12-01-2016 07:50 AM
craftybear
Links and Resources
1
10-25-2011 03:58 PM
MaryKatherine
Pictures
138
05-10-2011 05:05 AM
craftybear
Main
22
07-06-2010 05:51 PM
