Originally Posted by seamstome

Well I am going to take the opposite approach. Do you want to have your feelings coddled or do you want to hone your skills? If you have asked her to help you hone your skills, that is her job. If you want somebody to tell you it's okay when it really isnt, then that's a friend's role.

Originally Posted by Dotha

Having taught a few classes in my lifetime, I understand how difficult it is. One beginner class (Turning Twenty) was going really well...or so I thought. Two of them were absolute beginners and were doing amazingly well. I tried not to hover over them and I thought I was an encourager telling them how great they were doing. They were so excited about what they were doing and asked how far they should go before the next class. I gave them the assignment but also told them that they were doing so well that if they felt they wanted to go beyond that, they could. It was a simple pattern and all basics had been covered. With their excitement I did not want to stop them if they wanted to go on and complete all the piecing. Besides that since they both had a hard time getting off of work and since they were progressing so well, they might not even want to come in for the last class but instead drop in during store hours for help if needed. Long story short, they did not come back to class but instead sent an email to my bosses explaining that I was not interested in them,I did not want them to come back to class and I don't know what else. I was watching them but I did not hover, did not want to make them nervous. When my bosses let me read the email from them, my mouth fell to the floor. I had not the slightest idea that they were unhappy with me. I had no idea that they preceived me as not interested and ignoring them. You couldhave knocked me over with a feather.

During class they did not want to take a lunch break. I had to make a phone call before 12:30 to cancel a hotel reservation. I should have stepped out of the class room...I know that now....but I did not. They complained to my boss that I made personal calls that were distracting to them. That one and only 'personal' call that i made lasted about 2 minutes and it should have been my lunch break except they did not want to break. I wrote back to them explaining where I was coming from. I tried to make the class relaxing and fun and encouraging. It was all wrong for them, I guess.

Another class...a stack 'n whack class....those are usually good to teach and a bit more intense than the Turning Twenty. One time I had a big class with a variety of personalities and skills. One was far too picky about parts that she did not need to be exact with because it was going to be trimmed back.... yet the next one would always say, "Oh you know me, close is good enough." Close is not good enough when you get down to the nitty gritty of s 'n w. So how does a teacher handle making one student loosen up when she is stressing about 'exact' on edges that don't matter and will be trimmed while the lady next to her will not listen to instruction that certain parts need to be exact. The lady who said, "Close is good enough" was never able to make it come together. I could not save her project. She took it to two other quilters who are better than I am, they could not save it. She will never ever say 'well, I guess close was not good enough." I take no responsibility for her failed project. I told her she needed to be exact on those cuts. She chose her way.

If you let people 'slide' without constructive criticisim, we are bad teachers because we are not precise enough. If we get too nit picky, then that is discouraging. Tough line to balance on. Another lady in a stack 'n whack class was absolutely thrilled with her project and deemed it a great success. Should I have told her that her blocks were way off kilter? I didn't. She was happy. If they would have been my blocks, I would have probably tossed them. I am more of "enjoy the journey'. If the 'journey' is not fun, why do it. I guess I tend to be more relaxed and not critical...helpful, hopefully, to prevent errors but if the student is happy with it, who am I to tell them it is wrong.

In my years in the industry, I have seen and heard of a lot of 'teacher' experiences. One lady that i met had taken a class from her very very good friend....a famous quilt book author but I will not mention her name. she said, "I love her as a friend but as a teacher, I could not tolerate her attitude of 'my way or the hi-way'.

Oh, then there was the hand quilting class that I took from DeeDee McElroy. She was the best if you ask me. Yet one lady walked out saying what a bad teacher she was. Dee Dee had me quilting 12 stitches per inch within just a little while. She broke it all down but that one lady walked out.

Teaching is hard because you just don't know what the expectations are. when I teach s 'n w, I stress that it is to teach the technique of stacking and whacking only.... they need to know how to finish it regarding the quilting and binding. That is not covered in class. some don't like that. Oh well.

I say to anyone who is not meshing with the teacher, move on. It is not worth it unless you are getting some instruction that you feel is really helpful. If not, enjoy your own journey. I am sure there are some that say I could use a class in color but you know what? I pick the colors that I like using no rules or color theory. And i don't care if someone criticizes my quilt. I enjoyed the journey.