Sadiemae

It definitely depends on the nursing home... After my late husband's last back surgery the doctor's were concerned with me hurting my back picking him up because he was 6' tall. I don't know why they were concerned because I had helped him every time before. Anyway, they put him in a care facility for a couple of months. He took his Christmas string quilt with him. It didn't even have his name one it. He got scared one time when they took him to the hospital because we couldn't find it--the nurses had folded it up very neatly and placed it safely in the closet. I did bring all of his things home to wash and dry them, so maybe that made a difference also, but we never had anything disappear(except word search puzzles-big deal). My complaints about the place were the lack of enough nurses for the patients.

TonnieLoree

I'm sure that would be lovely. :thumbup:

colleenancel

I would get the fabric that is needed for the project, not more. Let her know the pattern calls for too much, or whatever the issue is.
One other thing--I have occasionally been put on the spot to do a quilt for someone else--their way--and I find it very annoying. Tell me if you think this is selfish:

If I were to contract to do a job (which is not the way I make quilts), I would take the order, do it exactly how they want me to, and accept the commission. If someone wants me to do a favor and make a quilt for someone else, give me some ideas and let me do something wonderful.

What does everyone else think about this?

seasaw2mch

By what I read you are feeling guilty about doing this sort of but at the same time you feel it's ok because you also help her out a lot.

I would say, that's all in what you can live with. It's not a bad idea to get an extra yard or so as long as you aren't taking advantage of her by doing so. It's a "I help you & you help me" sort of thing. Certainly one extra yard for yourself is not a lot to ask in this case. But that is just my opinion.

cheryl rearick

I do have a question? She lives 25 miles away.... She is elderly, Wouldn't it be easier to engage a caregiving business that would just take her shopping or change light bulbs.... PLUS most towns have (check senior citizens) brochure of help lines.... For just a little gas money will drive people miles to a Dr. Appt. grocery store lots of things out there. Although those people naturally ae not her son... When I lived in Carson City in a apt. a lady friend told me about this help... She even had her own car, cleaned her home the works... But had someone drive her to Reno.... (((hugs))) no fun growning old (er).... lol :)

bigsister63

Well said and I heartly agree! When you first posted the subject you said that it was for you MIL''s mother not you husband's grandmother.That is very telling about you attitude toward your husband. Remember you to will be old someday!!!

Donnasue

My mother was in an assisted living facility before she passed away last July. I made two quilts that "disappeared", and no one could tell us where they went. I agree-make sure you or she takes it home to wash and bring it back. Also, more than that will disappear-be careful what you take for her to have in her room. Speaking from recent experience.

OHSue

Let her buy the fabric, do not use your own fabric. So what if there is extra, that is the nature of quilting and has to be accepted.
My MIL has since passed away, but when she was alive she could suck the life out of you, she never ever went to the store alone, and we live over an hour away, but my husband would get called to the house all the time because she needed something. And then they would go to the drug store and she would buy razors or house shoes. She would give her money to my SIL and then call us cause she needed money, or give my SIL her coat and then call us because she needed a new coat. No one in her home town would help her because she had sucked the life out of every person there. Do what you can and grit your teeth. Remind yourself that you do this for your husband and not for her. Keep saying this is Karma and maybe someday when I am old this will be repaid.

OHSue

Let her buy the fabric, do not use your own fabric. So what if there is extra, that is the nature of quilting and has to be accepted.
My MIL has since passed away, but when she was alive she could suck the life out of you, she never ever went to the store alone, and we live over an hour away, but my husband would get called to the house all the time because she needed something. And then they would go to the drug store and she would buy razors or house shoes. She would give her money to my SIL and then call us cause she needed money, or give my SIL her coat and then call us because she needed a new coat. No one in her home town would help her because she had sucked the life out of every person there. Do what you can and grit your teeth. Remind yourself that you do this for your husband and not for her. Keep saying this is Karma and maybe someday when I am old this will be repaid.

Sadiemae

MIL decided to BUY one!!!!!!!