Originally Posted by Willa

How about 3 nights out?
One night you both ignore your other "loves" and go do something like going out to eat, visiting with friends either at home or their place, go play cards, bowling, etc.
One night you do what he wants to do. If he wants to watch tv then that's what you do that night.
One night you do what you want. If you want to quilt then guess what that's what he gets to do also. Start a quilt with him from planning to sewing. Get him involved. Maybe he'll start to enjoy it too.
The other 4 nights are each your own.

Originally Posted by Sing

I'm going to get all therapy touchy-feely on you, okay? Have you heard of the book "The 5 Love Languages"? Try it. The premise is that each person has a specific love language, something that makes that person feel loved. This has nothing to do with intellect, just emotions. So, maybe for someone it's Words of Affirmation (they like to hear that they are wonderful, beautiful, strong, etc.) and for someone else it's Quality Time (sitting together watching TV) and for someone else it's Acts of Service (husband mowing the lawn makes wife feel loved). Now, the counter to that is that when someone uses a language that is NOT someone else's love language, it makes the person feel unloved. So, if someone's love language is Quality Time, then providing Acts of Service feels awful. If wife wants Quality Time, but husband spends time fixing the gate, mowing the lawn, wife feels unloved.

Okay, having said that... I know that quilting is a hobby, so it's not specifically a love language. But, maybe if your H's love language is Quality Time, then spending 30 minutes with him watching TV would make him feel loved, and then he would be happy for you to spend time in your quilting cave.

Of course, he should also use your love language for you. So, he should understand that Words of Affirmation about your completed quilt makes you feel loved.

When both parties use each other's love language, every feels loved.

Originally Posted by DogHouseMom

Sorry to hear that Dianne. I have a theory about marriages. I think that every couple needs 3 hobbies between them. One for him. One for her. And one for both of them to enjoy together.

Try to engage him in a hobby that you can enjoy together!!

Originally Posted by BettyGee

I appreciate the idea. I do stay with him in the evening. It is all day when he watches TV. I can't do that. I am 70 years old and I am going to do as much with my time as I can and watching TV is not in my plans. I love him with all my heart, but I have cancer and while it is in remission now I cannot count on that being the case forever. I'm going to do everything I can to squeeze as much out of every day and still try to be a companion to the man I love. Right now I feel like a good cry is in order.

Originally Posted by Aurora

You have to feel sorry for those who only sit and watch TV. Sometimes I think they are a little jealous that we have such productive hobbies. Somedays I watch TV, knit and cook at the same time. Being able to multi-task balances our lives and temperments, which is most fortunate for those who share our space.

Originally Posted by TexasSunshine

I'm also blessed in that my husband supports my quilting. He will go to quilt shows with me and helps me with things when I need it. He made me a design wall, large ironing board, put shelves together for me and fixes my machines when something go wrong I can't figure out.

Originally Posted by diannemc

My Darling? Husband is a TV person..He has no hobbies...Watching TV is all he does when not working...I am not!!..I love my sewing..He has always hated my sewing...
I don't know why except maybe the money it takes and the time it takes away from him...(and maybe the pins he has had to pull out of his barefoot a time or two :oops:)
Well the other day I finished a quilt and showed it to him.. He said "Thank goodness you are through".. I am sick of all this quilting..It use to be sewing now quilting... I wish you would just stop it..." I just turned and looked him square in the eyes and said.."Quilting makes me happy....and trust me....You want me to be happy..." Am I the only one here who has a hard time with a husband who doesn't understand to joy of quilting??