Rude Guild Members/Need Help
05-03-2011, 03:20 PM
#41
Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Galloway,Ohio
Posts: 616
As i read all the great suggestions I now wonder am I guilty of this? Our meeting is next Thursday. I shall try to be more respectful to our leaders. I am so excited to see everyone and sometimes get overly so and forget. :hunf:
05-03-2011, 03:57 PM
#42
Super Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Tampa Bay Area, Florida
Posts: 2,229
Just want to add one thing, you have the advantage coming in to your position. When you address this issue -and it needs to be in the first meeting and early in your opening remarks- introduce it as a topic you've been asked to address (you asked yourself to deal with this right?). Also an additional concern I would think would be your group developing a reputation of being a rude group speakers would want to avoid. As a teacher I agree with having the group involved in the solution- this is more effective with any age group then being told this is what will happen. Owning the solutions makes compliance a greater possibility.
05-03-2011, 04:04 PM
#43
Super Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: St Pauls, NC
Posts: 2,470
This has always worked beautifully for me. Only in rare occasions have I used the gavel. However, if necessary, I have been known to do just that. My thinking, if the adults are so rude that they don't know to keep personal conversations to absolute minimum, I don't mind embarrasing them. By the time we get to our ages, we SHOULD have learned there is a time to be respectful to the person speaking.
Originally Posted by gal288
During my career, one of my duties was running training sessions for groups of 50+. Chit chat during the meeting was always a problem until I used this method.
When I noticed someone talking, I would simply say, "Peg, do you have a question? or Peg, would you like to share your comments with the group?, or anything that would draw attention to the person talking." They will back down and sit quietly after that.
Once the group realizes that you are going to call on them, the talking stops. It's amazing how people don't want to be singled out.
After a couple of meetings, they get the message and usually the meetings run smoother from there on.
Hope this helps.
When I noticed someone talking, I would simply say, "Peg, do you have a question? or Peg, would you like to share your comments with the group?, or anything that would draw attention to the person talking." They will back down and sit quietly after that.
Once the group realizes that you are going to call on them, the talking stops. It's amazing how people don't want to be singled out.
After a couple of meetings, they get the message and usually the meetings run smoother from there on.
Hope this helps.
05-03-2011, 04:21 PM
#44
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 2,943
Originally Posted by bearisgray
Bring duct tape to put over their mouths if they start talking while the speaker is doing her presentation?
That really does irritate me when people yap then. :hunf:
Rude people don't seem to acknowledge or get subtle hints about their obnoxious behavior.
That really does irritate me when people yap then. :hunf:
Rude people don't seem to acknowledge or get subtle hints about their obnoxious behavior.
I have noticed that it seems to matter who is doing the interrupting. This upsets me even more ... esp when they are friends of the group leader.
I tried to use the term "Remember ...." rather that "Please do not ..." and it kinda worked.
I really wish every member had her own paper and pencil and then the ones with comments could write them out instead of talking. Since I know I can talk too, I take paper and try to keep quiet.
ali
05-03-2011, 04:45 PM
#45
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 1,087
I have used a water pistol in meetings with a persistent talker. It got to the point that I could not hear anything but their voice, and I asked them repeatedly, nicely to be quiet, or I would shoot them. It only took one soaking!
I understand that in the US you have slightly more relaxed laws about what kind of pistols you can carry :)
I understand that in the US you have slightly more relaxed laws about what kind of pistols you can carry :)
05-04-2011, 03:44 AM
#48
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,761
This happens not only in guild meetings ....it happens at meetings of any kind. There is a great little book out there that is available on Amazon.com called, "Say It In Six". The original is out of print but there are used copies available. It might be helpful.
05-04-2011, 03:45 AM
#49
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Southern New Jersey
Posts: 360
We had the same problem at our meetings. It was decided by the officers to address this matter and discussed with the group. Also that the gravel would be brought back to the meetings. I know if there is people around me talking I just politiely tell them that I can not hear what the people are saying. This has helped.
05-04-2011, 03:47 AM
#50
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: IL, USA
Posts: 376
We've had this happen at a knitting guild I used to belong to. One of the problems there was that there wasn't enough time for knitting, talking and sharing between members on our own.
This guild only met once a month and you couldn't get to know anyone between the president talking and the guest speaker.
The speakers often went over their time and a lot of talking would happen to try to get the speaker to wrap up. Some crazy person booked a speaker on how to protect your identity. At that meeting half the members walked out before the presentation started and sat in another room to knit together. It was a knitting group, they didn't want to hear a non-knitting topic.
They did a survey to ask the guild members what they wanted and a overwhelming majority wanted less programs and more knitting. Maybe it would be best to ask the group what they want out of the guild? It could be they just want less programs.
Well guess what happened this year to that guild? 1/2 the members quit this year including me and now we just get together to knit and chat one evening a week, which has lead to great friendships, road trips, KAL's., etc.
I have been leery to check out the local quilt guild, but it seems like they have a lot more opportunities for folks to get together to quilt together and build friendships, so when an actual talking program takes place they are more likely to listen.
~ Rose
This guild only met once a month and you couldn't get to know anyone between the president talking and the guest speaker.
The speakers often went over their time and a lot of talking would happen to try to get the speaker to wrap up. Some crazy person booked a speaker on how to protect your identity. At that meeting half the members walked out before the presentation started and sat in another room to knit together. It was a knitting group, they didn't want to hear a non-knitting topic.
They did a survey to ask the guild members what they wanted and a overwhelming majority wanted less programs and more knitting. Maybe it would be best to ask the group what they want out of the guild? It could be they just want less programs.
Well guess what happened this year to that guild? 1/2 the members quit this year including me and now we just get together to knit and chat one evening a week, which has lead to great friendships, road trips, KAL's., etc.
I have been leery to check out the local quilt guild, but it seems like they have a lot more opportunities for folks to get together to quilt together and build friendships, so when an actual talking program takes place they are more likely to listen.
~ Rose
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