Teacher vs Quilt Police
#41
Well, I don't generally think of a teacher as the quilt police. After all, you are there because you want to learn something. And if she doesnt do anything but praise you, you come away feeling good, but may not have aquired any new skills. Thats not to say a teacher shouldn't encourage you, but if you took a class to learn the proper way to do something, or a particular technique, you've at least gotten your money's worth. Then you can leave class and quilt any way you jolly well please! I always think the quilt police are the ones who point out your mistakes and give advise WHEN YOU DON'T ASK THEM!
#42
Power Poster
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Citrus County, Florida
Posts: 10,849
If that is the way she is teaching, it is time to find a new teacher. There are ways to show a student their mistakes without making them feel like a failure. If you need to get the point across and all else has failed, you can always ask, "what am I doing right?"
#43
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 957
Well I am going to take the opposite approach. Do you want to have your feelings coddled or do you want to hone your skills? If you have asked her to help you hone your skills, that is her job. If you want somebody to tell you it's okay when it really isnt, then that's a friend's role.
#44
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 957
Having taught a few classes in my lifetime, I understand how difficult it is. One beginner class (Turning Twenty) was going really well...or so I thought. Two of them were absolute beginners and were doing amazingly well. I tried not to hover over them and I thought I was an encourager telling them how great they were doing. They were so excited about what they were doing and asked how far they should go before the next class. I gave them the assignment but also told them that they were doing so well that if they felt they wanted to go beyond that, they could. It was a simple pattern and all basics had been covered. With their excitement I did not want to stop them if they wanted to go on and complete all the piecing. Besides that since they both had a hard time getting off of work and since they were progressing so well, they might not even want to come in for the last class but instead drop in during store hours for help if needed. Long story short, they did not come back to class but instead sent an email to my bosses explaining that I was not interested in them,I did not want them to come back to class and I don't know what else. I was watching them but I did not hover, did not want to make them nervous. When my bosses let me read the email from them, my mouth fell to the floor. I had not the slightest idea that they were unhappy with me. I had no idea that they preceived me as not interested and ignoring them. You couldhave knocked me over with a feather.
During class they did not want to take a lunch break. I had to make a phone call before 12:30 to cancel a hotel reservation. I should have stepped out of the class room...I know that now....but I did not. They complained to my boss that I made personal calls that were distracting to them. That one and only 'personal' call that i made lasted about 2 minutes and it should have been my lunch break except they did not want to break. I wrote back to them explaining where I was coming from. I tried to make the class relaxing and fun and encouraging. It was all wrong for them, I guess.
Another class...a stack 'n whack class....those are usually good to teach and a bit more intense than the Turning Twenty. One time I had a big class with a variety of personalities and skills. One was far too picky about parts that she did not need to be exact with because it was going to be trimmed back.... yet the next one would always say, "Oh you know me, close is good enough." Close is not good enough when you get down to the nitty gritty of s 'n w. So how does a teacher handle making one student loosen up when she is stressing about 'exact' on edges that don't matter and will be trimmed while the lady next to her will not listen to instruction that certain parts need to be exact. The lady who said, "Close is good enough" was never able to make it come together. I could not save her project. She took it to two other quilters who are better than I am, they could not save it. She will never ever say 'well, I guess close was not good enough." I take no responsibility for her failed project. I told her she needed to be exact on those cuts. She chose her way.
If you let people 'slide' without constructive criticisim, we are bad teachers because we are not precise enough. If we get too nit picky, then that is discouraging. Tough line to balance on. Another lady in a stack 'n whack class was absolutely thrilled with her project and deemed it a great success. Should I have told her that her blocks were way off kilter? I didn't. She was happy. If they would have been my blocks, I would have probably tossed them. I am more of "enjoy the journey'. If the 'journey' is not fun, why do it. I guess I tend to be more relaxed and not critical...helpful, hopefully, to prevent errors but if the student is happy with it, who am I to tell them it is wrong.
In my years in the industry, I have seen and heard of a lot of 'teacher' experiences. One lady that i met had taken a class from her very very good friend....a famous quilt book author but I will not mention her name. she said, "I love her as a friend but as a teacher, I could not tolerate her attitude of 'my way or the hi-way'.
Oh, then there was the hand quilting class that I took from DeeDee McElroy. She was the best if you ask me. Yet one lady walked out saying what a bad teacher she was. Dee Dee had me quilting 12 stitches per inch within just a little while. She broke it all down but that one lady walked out.
Teaching is hard because you just don't know what the expectations are. when I teach s 'n w, I stress that it is to teach the technique of stacking and whacking only.... they need to know how to finish it regarding the quilting and binding. That is not covered in class. some don't like that. Oh well.
I say to anyone who is not meshing with the teacher, move on. It is not worth it unless you are getting some instruction that you feel is really helpful. If not, enjoy your own journey. I am sure there are some that say I could use a class in color but you know what? I pick the colors that I like using no rules or color theory. And i don't care if someone criticizes my quilt. I enjoyed the journey.
During class they did not want to take a lunch break. I had to make a phone call before 12:30 to cancel a hotel reservation. I should have stepped out of the class room...I know that now....but I did not. They complained to my boss that I made personal calls that were distracting to them. That one and only 'personal' call that i made lasted about 2 minutes and it should have been my lunch break except they did not want to break. I wrote back to them explaining where I was coming from. I tried to make the class relaxing and fun and encouraging. It was all wrong for them, I guess.
Another class...a stack 'n whack class....those are usually good to teach and a bit more intense than the Turning Twenty. One time I had a big class with a variety of personalities and skills. One was far too picky about parts that she did not need to be exact with because it was going to be trimmed back.... yet the next one would always say, "Oh you know me, close is good enough." Close is not good enough when you get down to the nitty gritty of s 'n w. So how does a teacher handle making one student loosen up when she is stressing about 'exact' on edges that don't matter and will be trimmed while the lady next to her will not listen to instruction that certain parts need to be exact. The lady who said, "Close is good enough" was never able to make it come together. I could not save her project. She took it to two other quilters who are better than I am, they could not save it. She will never ever say 'well, I guess close was not good enough." I take no responsibility for her failed project. I told her she needed to be exact on those cuts. She chose her way.
If you let people 'slide' without constructive criticisim, we are bad teachers because we are not precise enough. If we get too nit picky, then that is discouraging. Tough line to balance on. Another lady in a stack 'n whack class was absolutely thrilled with her project and deemed it a great success. Should I have told her that her blocks were way off kilter? I didn't. She was happy. If they would have been my blocks, I would have probably tossed them. I am more of "enjoy the journey'. If the 'journey' is not fun, why do it. I guess I tend to be more relaxed and not critical...helpful, hopefully, to prevent errors but if the student is happy with it, who am I to tell them it is wrong.
In my years in the industry, I have seen and heard of a lot of 'teacher' experiences. One lady that i met had taken a class from her very very good friend....a famous quilt book author but I will not mention her name. she said, "I love her as a friend but as a teacher, I could not tolerate her attitude of 'my way or the hi-way'.
Oh, then there was the hand quilting class that I took from DeeDee McElroy. She was the best if you ask me. Yet one lady walked out saying what a bad teacher she was. Dee Dee had me quilting 12 stitches per inch within just a little while. She broke it all down but that one lady walked out.
Teaching is hard because you just don't know what the expectations are. when I teach s 'n w, I stress that it is to teach the technique of stacking and whacking only.... they need to know how to finish it regarding the quilting and binding. That is not covered in class. some don't like that. Oh well.
I say to anyone who is not meshing with the teacher, move on. It is not worth it unless you are getting some instruction that you feel is really helpful. If not, enjoy your own journey. I am sure there are some that say I could use a class in color but you know what? I pick the colors that I like using no rules or color theory. And i don't care if someone criticizes my quilt. I enjoyed the journey.
#45
Power Poster
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MN
Posts: 24,655
Is this a one-on-one session?
Had you met this person before signing up?
Why did you sign up with this person?
Have you learned anything new?
I agree that not all styles of teaching work with all types of learners.
I also agree that is is nice to get a few "attagirls" now and then, along with the "these could be betters"
Had you met this person before signing up?
Why did you sign up with this person?
Have you learned anything new?
I agree that not all styles of teaching work with all types of learners.
I also agree that is is nice to get a few "attagirls" now and then, along with the "these could be betters"
#46
Super Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 2,048
Since I believe you are paying for her advice, I would think about why I started the relationship and are you meeting the goals you had for having her teach you. Sounds to me that a good discussion is in order if you are getting out of these class what you need, or even if you are not.
Some people have not been trained to speak to other constructively. (Constructive does not meet blunt, if you really want the person's attention the two parties need to be working toward a common goal). (e.g. my daughter is a PreK teacher and was having parent teacher conferences with her assistance. The assistant told the parents, your child can speak loudly enough where my daughter indicated the same concern in the statement: It would be beneficial if you work with your child summer on speaking louder in class as he prepares to move to Kindergarten in the fall.) Same thing was said, but one was blunt and pointed to a problem with the student, the other points to an opportunity for improvement. You are looking for opportunities for improvement with your quilting.
Some people have not been trained to speak to other constructively. (Constructive does not meet blunt, if you really want the person's attention the two parties need to be working toward a common goal). (e.g. my daughter is a PreK teacher and was having parent teacher conferences with her assistance. The assistant told the parents, your child can speak loudly enough where my daughter indicated the same concern in the statement: It would be beneficial if you work with your child summer on speaking louder in class as he prepares to move to Kindergarten in the fall.) Same thing was said, but one was blunt and pointed to a problem with the student, the other points to an opportunity for improvement. You are looking for opportunities for improvement with your quilting.
#47
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 6,430
There is more than 1 way to "skin that cat." If you are only getting negative feedback, tell the teacher that you need to know what you are doing right and well. If she can't do that, then she is in the wrong business. Surely you are doing some things right.
#48
As a quilting teacher I try very conscientiously to encourage and recognize the progress of those in my classes. Quilting won't be fun if you are constantly criticized. On the other hand, if you want to hone your skills, you need the assistance of someone with more experience than yourself. So it sounds to me that perhaps it's the WAY she is speaking to you, rather than WHAT she is saying. If you feel this teacher has things to share that you want to learn, perhaps you could have a private conversation with her and explain that criticism isn't helpful to your progress, and ask her to make her suggestions in a more positive manner. If that doesn't work out, find a new teacher with more sensitivity. Good luck!
#49
I teach myself and read all about quilt making that I can get my hands on. I don't take classes and I don't show my quilts, (other than on this site). I certainly don't ask anyone how to do anything nor do I ever ask anyone's opinion.
Quilt making is for my own pleasure.
Maybe you would be better to get another teacher. I have just made my 100th quilt and been sewing about 46-47 years. I am still trying to make my first perfect quilt, doubt I ever will but, if I keep trying I may get closer.
Quilt making is for my own pleasure.
Maybe you would be better to get another teacher. I have just made my 100th quilt and been sewing about 46-47 years. I am still trying to make my first perfect quilt, doubt I ever will but, if I keep trying I may get closer.
#50
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Indiana
Posts: 450
I think it has to be up to you to explain what you need and if the teacher can't provide it then it is time to move on. Different people have different styles of learning (and teaching).
I have a book that I bought because I saw one of the quilts in it made up. It had wonderful reviews on Amazon. I hated that book so much that I copied the pages I actually needed for that one quilt and burnt that $20 book so as not to inflict it upon someone else. Other people have told me how much they LOVE this quilter's books. I won't buy another and I won't buy a single piece of their fabric line because the book upset me so much.
My point is, I know that I can't use her stuff. So, I moved on.
I hope you find a teacher that you mesh with.
I have a book that I bought because I saw one of the quilts in it made up. It had wonderful reviews on Amazon. I hated that book so much that I copied the pages I actually needed for that one quilt and burnt that $20 book so as not to inflict it upon someone else. Other people have told me how much they LOVE this quilter's books. I won't buy another and I won't buy a single piece of their fabric line because the book upset me so much.
My point is, I know that I can't use her stuff. So, I moved on.
I hope you find a teacher that you mesh with.
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