Sad, but .........
09-13-2011, 10:12 AM
#21
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 3,812
My sister lost a baby boy right before his birth. The hardest part still, all these many years later, is people never acknowledged their son who died. He was a real person, and by not mentioning him the pain is that much worse. I think the two by two would probably be good. Don't assume it will hurt her more-I suspect it will mean the world to her that you remember the child they lost.
Kat
Kat
09-13-2011, 10:15 AM
#22
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Location: Ohio... wanna build a cabin in the woods and live off the land... and quilt all day!
Posts: 990
I would say follow your heart ~ My youngest son was a twin, we lost his brother in-utero ~ so lucky to have him, so he's very much a momma's boy. I would have cried buckets during the first couple months being presented with something like that. Maybe wait and see how the parents acknowledge the loss, i.e. do they talk about him? or not? or build a memorial shrine within the home... go with what your heart tells you
09-13-2011, 10:15 AM
#23
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Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Iowa
Posts: 8,816
Love this idea. Very thoughtful and all encompassing.
Originally Posted by sweetana3
I would make sure there was a wonderful rainbow and one dove flying. I agree with the others to go with your feelings and knowledge of the mother. It does not need to be a surprise.
09-13-2011, 11:38 AM
#25
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Luck, Wisconsin
Posts: 25
I would definitely complete the quilt and present it to the parents. Perhaps on the label you could make a statement like..........
One in your hands, One in God's"............
I also know of young parents that gave birth to twins and sadly the one died just 10 short days later. Both Mother and Father were grieved by the fact that no one mentioned the twin that had died. Yes, they grieve but they also want to celebrate the birth of and lives of both twins.
Please finish Noah's Ark.
One in your hands, One in God's"............
I also know of young parents that gave birth to twins and sadly the one died just 10 short days later. Both Mother and Father were grieved by the fact that no one mentioned the twin that had died. Yes, they grieve but they also want to celebrate the birth of and lives of both twins.
Please finish Noah's Ark.
09-13-2011, 12:12 PM
#26
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Cadillac, MI
Posts: 6,487
I would make each baby their own quilt. I had a stillborn twin and a strong, healthy one. While I wanted people to acknowledge J's existence, I don't think I would have wanted a constant visual reminder. If you make separate quilts the family can choose whether to store or display the deceased twin's quilt and still know you cared. Then the survivor can have his own. I did not tell my son until he was a teenager that he had a brother. He was glad as he said he always felt as he something was missing, but I'm glad I waited. I think it would it have been a lot for a young one to handle.
09-13-2011, 02:05 PM
#27
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Minnesota, Land of 10,000 Lakes
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Originally Posted by kkdolls
Please accept my sympathy for the family. I had twin daughters and lost one when she was nearly 19. Give the Mother a while, but I bet she will be delighted to have them both included in your quilt. There was 2, and always will be. One will just live in heaven.
God bless you for your kindness.
God bless you for your kindness.
09-13-2011, 02:06 PM
#28
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Minnesota, Land of 10,000 Lakes
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Originally Posted by quilter51
I would definitely complete the quilt and present it to the parents. Perhaps on the label you could make a statement like..........
One in your hands, One in God's"............
I also know of young parents that gave birth to twins and sadly the one died just 10 short days later. Both Mother and Father were grieved by the fact that no one mentioned the twin that had died. Yes, they grieve but they also want to celebrate the birth of and lives of both twins.
Please finish Noah's Ark.
One in your hands, One in God's"............
I also know of young parents that gave birth to twins and sadly the one died just 10 short days later. Both Mother and Father were grieved by the fact that no one mentioned the twin that had died. Yes, they grieve but they also want to celebrate the birth of and lives of both twins.
Please finish Noah's Ark.
09-13-2011, 02:07 PM
#29
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Minnesota, Land of 10,000 Lakes
Posts: 1,490
Originally Posted by irishrose
I would make each baby their own quilt. I had a stillborn twin and a strong, healthy one. While I wanted people to acknowledge J's existence, I don't think I would have wanted a constant visual reminder. If you make separate quilts the family can choose whether to store or display the deceased twin's quilt and still know you cared. Then the survivor can have his own. I did not tell my son until he was a teenager that he had a brother. He was glad as he said he always felt as he something was missing, but I'm glad I waited. I think it would it have been a lot for a young one to handle.
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