Debbie B

My daughter is 34, married with 2 girls. Lucky for me she lives just a few blocks away, but she works full time and with two children to take care of & a house, I don't see her as much as I would like. Very thankful for the time I do have with her! My son is 24 and lives in WV. They've been out of the nest for a while now and I still miss them. I just keep telling myself that life changes and life goes on. I am lucky to have a wonderful husband that I enjoy doing things with.

quiltluvr

For me it would be much easier to know they were closer distance wise. I don't feel the need to monopolize them, we all have our own lives, but the separation by distance brings its own problems too, timing visits with work and money are huge, especially now. And of course the eventual emotional distance that happens to some degree. Phones are fine, emails/pics etc. are good but they certainly aren't a substitute.

Only time will tell how the whole adjustment time will end up. But for now, for me, part of the reality of my little piece of the world is going to crash shortly. I have my permission to feel this in all it's entirety and not have a lick of guilt or shame.

craftybear

you will be okay, take a deep breath, can you take his room and turn it into a sewing room for yourself??

quiltluvr

diannemc

I know just how you feel...The empty nest was and still is hard...Just keep busy...both my girls were living about a hour away..now that we have moved they are only 20 minutes away...Thought we would see them more but we don't..They have their own lives and I have to stand back and let them live it...They know mama is here when they need me...the oldest one graduated in May and if she doesn't find a job by August when her rent runs out she will have to move back home..Something she is not wanting to do...and I understand that..That will be different?

quilting memaw

My sister is going to be going through that same thing soon. She is very close to her son. I will be there for her. We will laugh and cry and remember. Spend time getting those pictures organized in an album, clean his room so on holidays or weekends, he will have a fresh room to come home to....And remember, you have done a great job in molding him into an adult.....stand proud....like my sis said, now she run through the house in her nighties!!! And she doesn't have to be quiet when doing the wild thing! LOL....HUGS!

lots2do

Yes, thank you for 'listening'. I do fear there's a little emotional menopause or perimenopause or something biological helping out here too with the emotions. Love the reminder about not having to be 'quiet'. Do have a sewing space already in the other spare room but am thinking of buying a really nice chair for that space to do hand sewing in. DH is already planning excursions - a weekend driving up the most scenic route in Vermont in the fall and the suggestion I find as many fabric shops as I can and a nice b and b to stay in. I think I'll start that t-shirt quilt for DS this summer and plan to give it to him at Christmas.
As you've reminded me, we will survive just fine. Glad to know this is normal.
Thanks again,
lots2do

Mousie

I walked around my house depressed for three months, when my baby went to kindergarten!
I know some won't understand that, but it was the first time in my whole life I was alone.
I thought I was going to weather the empty nest better, but when my last daughter of three, got married, I didn't react right away.
Two months later ended up in e.r. bc my thyroid was out of range...again, and b-12 was too high...so giving me a false high.
Got the blood straightened out and had to have my head checked! lol
Suddenly, I wasn't so good with the, 'everybodies all grown up' and don't really need me, thing.
DH needs me, but one of those obstinate ones that will not show it.
It's been 7 1/2 years now and I love having the house all to myself to sew.
If your sadness persists it may be more than an empty house,...mine was. Too many ghosts rattling for it to really be empty.

lots2do

Good advice, thank you, Mousie.

JEM65

Dear Lots2do, It is so hard everytime, especially the first time. I am in GA and had to leave my oldest in Boston at 17! Now I leave my middle son at the University of New Hampshire with you! LOL! My youngest, a sassy girl is staying in Georgia but will be an hour and a half away! I did make my middle son's bedroom my sewing room last winter - now he's home for the summer & I want my room back! LOL! It does get easier with time though, that I can promise you.