Thread: Do non-quilters have any idea of the work that goes into a quilt?

Kara's reply was right on. Pick and choose your quilt recipients. In your heart of hearts you know you have done a wonderful job wih your quilt and that alone is enough for me. Also, I would really have to think over whether I would make a hand quilted (except wall hangings and such) for anyone who is not quilt savvy. Save those for your friends who REALLY appreciate it. And I find the lack of gift acknowledgement in the younger generation a real turn off for me.

BlueChicken:
Your story was beautiful and really touched my heart. I agree with everything you said. We quilt for ourselves and the satisfaction it gives us. The time we spend is love time in everyway. That is what I remember now when I give my quilts away. I do it because I want to and because I care about the person I give it to.

I make sure the receiver knows how many hours I spent making the quilt. Especially the hand quilted ones. I generally get a better reaction.

Originally Posted by BlueChicken

It was the process, not the product, that was important.

That's how I feel about it, as well.

i'm sorry that people are so rude.. i haven't given a quilt away in a long time but have crocheted baby afghans and not even get a thank you card. one person has it written out but wants her aunt to bring it to me---can't she just mail it? that has been 3 months ago---good grief!!!

THanks Blue Chicken...your thought express my feelings better than my previous answer.

Recently I have not checked e-mails very often so this is a late comment. In previous posts I have talked about our autistic granddaughter who has learned and is still learning to quilt. In ARD meetings at school with some highly educated (?) administrative people in attendance, I have taken examples of her work. So few of these "professionals" have understood the great accomplishment of this skill. Usually, the classroom teachers, especially the art teachers, get it. It amuses me to note that the classroom teachers are normally dressed in comfortable shoes, practical working clothes, with down to earth attitudes and expectations while the administrative group appear in the latest fashions with perfect hair and make-up and absolutely no clue concerning our kids accomplishments. It would appear that these "dressed-up" models are more interested in themselves than the kids, so there could not be any kind of appreciation for any accomplishments of these special kids. I would assume that giving these people anything that did not have a designer tag would be totally unappreciated. On the other hand most of the teachers who see her daily in the classroom understand how hard she has worked on her quilting project and the talent she has for putting colors together as well as her quality workmanship. Haley is now 15 and continues to make great strides. The school has only wanted to teach her to print and has really refused to introduce cursive writing. Haley, with a little help from me, has taught herself to write, but at the beginning of this school year began bringing home work papers which were those pre-k work sheets which have the kids tracing the letters and numbers!!!!!!! I just don't get it, and I hope I left them "burned up" after our recent meeting where I told them they had wasted their time, Haley's time, my time!!!! If we think we have a lot invested in our quilting supplies, can any one of us even calculate the amount of money that has gone into the education (??????) of these people for special needs children??? Then there is their salaries which our tax money pays!!!!!!! When I read comments about not being thanked or appreciated for the gift of a quilt, I am remined of the educators who have no appreciation for the accomplishments of a developmentally challenged student. You can bet your behind that some of the educators I've seen couldn't understand how important quilts were to the pioneers or how a lot of them were so clever in using their scraps to produce an article to protect themselves and their families from the cold. By the way, my best friend is a 4th grade teacher. She is just as surprised as I over some of the attitudes from school, and like I stated earlier it has normally been the classroom teacher who understands the efforts and accomplishments of their students and for these teachers, I have great love and appreciation.

For the ultimate in not appreciating a quilt that breaks my heart... My grandmother died about 10 years ago and some time before she died she told me that she was visiting her daughter (my aunt) and saw that the double wedding ring quilt she had given her daughter that HER mother had made (my Great Grandmother) was stuffed between the seat and the foot rest of a recliner and her husband had his "nasty feet" dug into it.

That is mind boggling! Not only didn't she appreciate the work that went into a quilt but treated a family heirloom like the cheapest blanket. I would give anything to have that quilt.

I posted a pic of some of the 80 Grandmother's Fan blocks that my Great Grandmother made around 1936 and that I will be putting together and someone's comment was right on... It is fortunate that they fell into my hands rather than someone who didn't know what they had.

well, my daughters have some idea that if mama gives you a homemade anything, better at least make some effort bc about four years ago I wore myself out one christmas crafting. Nobody even blinked! They grew up with me sewing for them, the house, etc. etc. and I didn't say much, but got into a slump, probably an anxiety that I put on myself, but couldn't sew for anybody but the grandbabies out of fear that they wouldn't like it.
Think they must have discussed it, bc they have voiced interest in my quilting stuff since then. I have openly said that if I did all that work and spent all that money, if they weren't pleased, to please keep it, even if it's in a closet and lie to me about how much they love it, lol!
They love me and i know that. Think they think i am going to make them something out of double knit or huge flowers like a hippie van, lol!
I used to like everything. I think my tastes have improved greatly, but I pay attention to what others like and have even asked them about preferences.
Now the grandbabies are very appreciative. I have one that hugs everything and ooh's and aw's big time.
I so agree though, ppl have no idea. To buy a gift is nice. To make a gift...that's priceless. C

Buddy Bear is a 6 yr. old Pomeranian. Spoiled rotten and smart. Becomes really jealous when I'm quilting.

:roll: Yes, I've had that reaction too often. My sister told me once when I got laid off from my job, "Good, now you have all this time, you can make me a quilt..." Did she not think that perhaps I might be busy looking for another job? She bought the fabric, and with the agreement, that when it was all done, she would at least pay me for the machine quilting in the end ($150). Of course, when I sent it to her, she sent me a thank you card thanking me for the "gift"....I mentioned to her that it was $150.00 that she owed me and referred to our "agreement"... She then said, "Well, I didn't get an invoice." I replied, "I didn't think I had to invoice integrity..." My check came 1 year later.

It was at that point that I made the decision to only make things for personal use in my own home, grandbabies, for sale, or charity.

NO, people don't get it.

I don't think that we are being unreasonable expecting a thank you note.

The ones that "get it" are the ones that buy quilts and those of us to make them.

:roll:

bluechicken, I posted before i saw more replies including yours.
I wouldn't change my reply, but when I read yours it helped my perspective.
It's not the product as much as the process. I can't agree 100% simply bc I have really liked some of the stuff i have made. I quilted a tote bag that I use everyday and never put it on the floor anywhere, but your right. I get so much out of the process of quilting.
I'm not looking for huge accolades for my work, just don't jam it in a crack to put your feet on....good grief! or use like a grease rag.
I'm not embarrassed to say i would like at least the same appreciation that anyone should express for any gift they receive.

think that it is awesome that an autistic child is learning quilting. I have a handicapped daughter, brother and sister-in-law, plus I forget, I have a couple myself. People used to go into education for the love of it. No appreciation for what they are doing either...so unable to show it with others. Well, thank goodness for those ppl in this world that smell the flowers, etc. they are enriching their own lives when they do.

bluechicken, I posted before i saw more replies including yours.
I wouldn't change my reply, but when I read yours it helped my perspective.
It's not the product as much as the process. I can't agree 100% simply bc I have really liked some of the stuff i have made. I quilted a tote bag that I use everyday and never put it on the floor anywhere, but your right. I get so much out of the process of quilting.
I'm not looking for huge accolades for my work, just don't jam it in a crack to put your feet on....good grief! or use like a grease rag.
I'm not embarrassed to say i would like at least the same appreciation that anyone should express for any gift they receive.

think that it is awesome that an autistic child is learning quilting. I have a handicapped daughter, brother and sister-in-law, plus I forget, I have a couple myself. People used to go into education for the love of it. No appreciation for what they are doing either...so unable to show it with others. Well, thank goodness for those ppl in this world that smell the flowers, etc. they are enriching their own lives when they do.

I can say from experience that non-quilters do not know what goes into the making of a quilt. I have people say can't you make a full size one in a day. I tell them only if I were an Octopus!! Then I explain all what goes in to making the quilt, they look at me like I've lost my mind. I just say I do it cause I like it and its fun. And it gives me pleasure. Maybe if they tried it, they would understand more. Keep your chin up, after 10 yrs. of doing this, my folks still don't get it, and my Dad's mother was a quilter. Go figure.

hand one of the administrators a few scraps of fabric and lets see what they can do, as i have always felt, quilting is from the heart

teetee, your absolutely right quilt making has to come from the heart or it would never get done. Cause it takes a person with alot of heart and caring to put all that heart and love into one just to get it finished. My mom-in-law used to say (passed away last year) that I had to much heart, so she was glad I became a quilt maker. She said it kept me out of trouble, and my mind and hands busy. She was my biggest fan!! She never was bored when I needed to use her brain for some quilt ideas, and she was always willing to help even though she didn't make quilts herself, she crocheted. But she encouraged me every step of the way and that is what all quilters need, from old to the new ones. Cause this can get frustrating at times. But for me, its worth every minute of frustration, stress, to the fun and joy of the completion when you can step back and look at the great work you did.

i have not made hardly any quilts. i want to quit but don't really have the time--working full time. the few times i have made quilts, they seem to be treasured. i made one for a sister 30 years ago. upon her death, my other sister spotted an old quilt in her belongings and knowing how much i love quilts, sneaked it away for me. when i received it, i kept looking at it thinking it looked familar. lo, and behold, the quilt was very tattered but i recognized those awful stitches. she had kept that quilt all those years, had used it until it was worn out and had laundered it and put it into something to perserve it. in my grief, i threw the quilt away knowing i would probably never restore it. :(

Originally Posted by granpee

i have not made hardly any quilts. i want to quit but don't really have the time--working full time. the few times i have made quilts, they seem to be treasured. i made one for a sister 30 years ago. upon her death, my other sister spotted an old quilt in her belongings and knowing how much i love quilts, sneaked it away for me. when i received it, i kept looking at it thinking it looked familar. lo, and behold, the quilt was very tattered but i recognized those awful stitches. she had kept that quilt all those years, had used it until it was worn out and had laundered it and put it into something to perserve it. in my grief, i threw the quilt away knowing i would probably never restore it. :(

How wonderful to know she treasured it for so long and how sad that you threw it out, sometimes don't you wish you could go back in time and change things?

every quilt I have made and given away has been greatly appreciated....and only one has gone to a quilter. Even though people might not know the amount of work it takes or every detail that goes into making one, MOST people still appreciate the work and the gift. I made a comment before about most people not knowing what goes into making a quilt, but then again I don't know the amount of work and detail a carpenter puts into their furniture...but I still greatly appreciate the work they do.

I realize that some of you have had bad experiences with recipients of your gifts and I'm sad that that has caused you to swear off of making gifts for people unless you know beforehand that they would appreciate it.

If you are making quilts for the love of quilting and giving them to people you love, then continue to do that, regardless of reactions from a few. I don't feel there is any reason to tell someone how much it costs (unless they are going to pay you for it) or how much time it took - to me that sounds like seeking glory for yourself instead of honoring the recipient of the quilt with the gift, which is really what it is all about, for me.

i thought about keeping it but needed somehow to not keep it. my sister committed suicide and that about destroyed me. she had schizophrena and all the quilt brought more sadness. i really don't regret throwing it away... i took a long time hugging the quilt, sniffing of her laundry detergent (the smell was still there) and keeping the quilt wouldn't bring back her----

(((granpee))) it probably wasn't easy sharing your story, but each one helps us all along our way. thanks.

I don't mean to veer off the topic on hand here, but i would like to say that I am so so amazed at how giving all of you are. I made one quilt so far, and it is like my baby, I don't think I can give it away. I am working on another one, and I don't think I can give that away either, I guess am still in my selfish ages, LOL,maybe I will gorw out of that when I have kids and such. And don't get me wrong, Il ove my family and friends, but during the process of making my quilt I was getting attached to it someway, and THIS is why I am quilting, it is becoming a passion of mine. I consider myself a giver, and I think my family and friends would agree, but man I am so amazed by all of you who make all these quilts to give away, and I am humbled by it. It sadens me to know that some people can't understand and treasure that.

Just felt that I need to share that with you, I've been reading this thread for a while and just humbled by how giving you all must be. I respect that immesly. Thanks for showing me that. ( Great, now I feel like I need to be giving aways quilts, LOL)

Candi

good news! i talked to one of my daughters and she said she retrieved the quilt of my sister's that i thought i had thrown away. i guess i will be restoring it after all.

That's exciting Granpee.