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Thread: Perfectionist vs. Good Enoughist

  1. #51
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mhollifiel View Post
    The quilts in museums like Paducah, KY blow me away. So do those in every quilt show. That said, I have no intention ever to have my quilts shown in either venue. My quilts are destined for use, heavy use. I make those quilts that rest between your sheets and your comforter or spread, never seen but giving love to those who sleep beneath their warmth. My quilts go under your picnic spread. get drug around by toddlers across the lawn and in mud puddles, and find themselves under young teens at the beach. My quilts cover the laps of strangers in retirement homes, show up at fires where a child who has lost her bear is comforted because, serendipitously, the bear on her new quilt looks exactly like the special one she just lost. The quilts I make end up in dog beds and in the backs of cars. They also leave hospitals with children who had the misfortune of being there but often will only sleep with that quilt afterwards. They cover sick family who begin to feel better and enjoy doing seek and find with the fabrics used, only two of each!

    Having no artistic gifts, I get by and no one seems to mind that I don't appliqué or paper piece and I use beautifully simple patterns. There's a world of need out there and I don't have time to be that particular. Yes, for me, done is better than perfect. I adore seeing those beautiful quilts in shows and museums but you won't find my quilts there. To my sisters and brothers who are the artists of the quilt world, kudos! Keep up the good work! I am taking care of the other end of the spectrum of quilters and enjoying it. The loving but utilitarian nature of quilting heritage is being taken care of by quilters like me. The quilt world is wide and all inclusive! Hooray for us all!
    wow, I love this!
    It is a blessing, to be a blessing !
    ~Quilters are warm people!!!~
    cheese brings parties together

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  2. #52
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gramajo View Post
    I am in the "better done than perfect" camp. I have many many ufos and wanna make quilts on my list, but my cancer has come back and even with chemo have been given only about 20% chance of living more than 2 years. So it's time to prioritize what I'm finishing. First up is to finish quilting a carousel panel I'm making for my someday-to-be first great granddaughter.

    p's gramajo...already done . I like your outlook.
    It's time to prioritize, times a wastin' and i ain't getting no younger.
    Let's spread the love.
    It is a blessing, to be a blessing !
    ~Quilters are warm people!!!~
    cheese brings parties together

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  3. #53
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Friday1961 View Post
    I'm not sure true perfectionists realize they Are perfectionists. They may not think in terms of "perfect" but in "right", as in "there's a right way and a half right way and a wrong way" and always insist on the right way. Is that perfectionism? Perhaps.....although many don't think of it that way. I think we all have a "perfect for me" which may not be the same standard as someone else's "perfect".

    I just made a cushion cover for a outdoor chair -- something that didn't matter At All in that I made it only for temporary comfort. I plan to replace all the patio chairs, most of which have no cushions. I had real problems sewing the bottom "plate" on the boxed corners of the top, just couldn't make it work properly and the end result was untidy and "not right". And yet the cushion cover was sewn together and would have been serviceable. But I ripped it out and persevered until I had no folds or wrinkles in those boxed corner seams. Is that perfectionism, OCD, or just my own personal "the right way"?

    I think the answer to what is "good enough" or "right enough" or even "perfect enough",
    is found in what the individual is trying to avoid.
    Some want to avoid leaving a loved one out and hurry a project even
    if it means points aren't perfect etc.
    I think some quilters want to avoid having someone else finding a flaw
    and pointing it out, especially a fellow quilter.
    Occasionally there are personalities that are driven to excel and just
    can't relax if they
    don't think the project is perfect.
    Could be they need to be better at their craft than
    the next person Or it could be that they had a parent or elder that
    always pointed out their mistakes.
    There are as many reasons for what is acceptable to each of us as
    there are quilters.
    Somebody just said it while ago, "there is room for all of us." ditto .
    Last edited by QuiltnNan; 06-09-2019 at 12:39 PM. Reason: shouting/all caps
    It is a blessing, to be a blessing !
    ~Quilters are warm people!!!~
    cheese brings parties together

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  4. #54
    Super Member tuckyquilter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Libits View Post
    As some of you might have guessed, I’m working on those darn puppies and, although I’ve come a long way, parts are still giving me fits but I’m getting through it. I mentioned something to my daughter and she lovingly said “Well, if you weren’t such a perfectionist…” Huh? Whaaat??? Then she pointed out that every meal I make is perfect (I don’t see it), every small appliance on my counter is perfectly aligned. Every candle has a perfectly trimmed ¼” wick, blah, blah, blah. I don’t set out to do that, it just happens.

    So I was wondering, when it comes to quilting, how many of you are perfectionists and how many of you are good-enoughists?
    I am Far from seeking perfect in quilting, housekeeping etc. "Do My Best" is more pleasing. I'm thinking OCD (it fits with what your DD described). It might also reflect in your clothes closet, how you store other things. LOL. But, this in not all that bad. Embrace it and give yourself a treat now and again. Just don't fold the candy bar wrapper neatly before you toss it in the trash..
    Last edited by QuiltnNan; 06-09-2019 at 12:40 PM. Reason: shouting/all caps
    Jackie
    Lover of Scrappy, Chocolate and Wine

  5. #55
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tuckyquilter View Post
    I am Far from seeking perfect in quilting, housekeeping etc. "Do My Best" is more pleasing. I'm thinking OCD (it fits with what your DD described). It might also reflect in your clothes closet, how you store other things. LOL. But this in not all that bad. Embrace it and give yourself a treat now and again. Just don't fold the candy bar wrapper neatly before you toss it in the trash..
    ..." Just don't fold the candy bar wrapper neatly before you toss it in the trash..."
    I might be in a little 'ocd' trouble. I fold the waxed paper on the sticks of
    butter when I remove them . I just do it without thinking...until you mentioned it.
    I admit I was very OCD when i was younger. Maybe some things just never
    really go away completely?
    Lol, I also have to completely, I mean completely clean my plate and I would
    have lived my entire life without knowing if my dh and my dd hadn't pointed
    it out some years ago.
    Ok, I'm thorough. I don't like waste, lol.
    Not the same as perfection. I think I don't want butter to get on...
    the other trash???
    Last edited by QuiltnNan; 06-09-2019 at 12:40 PM.
    It is a blessing, to be a blessing !
    ~Quilters are warm people!!!~
    cheese brings parties together

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  6. #56
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    It takes up less room in the trash container if the paper is folded instead of wadded.

  7. #57
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    thank you, bear! I sure hate untidy trash .
    It is a blessing, to be a blessing !
    ~Quilters are warm people!!!~
    cheese brings parties together

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  8. #58
    Junior Member juliasb's Avatar
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    I have 'rushed' through a number of quilts when I first started quilting. they looked 'rushed' too. They were much loved by the people that received them as gifts. However now I am known to take a bit more time. I find hand quilting very relaxing and something I can do in the evenings when watching TV. I now only make a few quilts each year and time my time at them. They reflect the right amount of time I spend on them too. Even though I always put my best into my quilting I found that time and experience are my best teachers.

  9. #59
    Super Member ccthomas's Avatar
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    I liked quilting.....back when I didn't even know there was "Perfect"

    I don't even like the word Perfect.
    Last edited by QuiltnNan; 06-10-2019 at 02:44 AM. Reason: shouting/all caps
    Carol

  10. #60
    Junior Member osewfast's Avatar
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    Depends on the project. Some projects - I'm relaxed and just having fun. I want it to be Right, but don't stress over perfection. I'm just enjoying the whole process, possibly learning new techniques, and embracing my creative soul. Close enough is fine. =)
    Other projects (paid projects especially) I work harder to get it right. I don't strive for perfection - but these projects are held to a higher Personal standard. IMO, only God is perfect. I'm very human - therefore happily imperfect. hahaha!
    All that being said - I'm stressing like crazy over my current quilt projects - 2 memorial quilts for my niece & nephew made from their dad/my brother's shirts. I've never made a t-shirt quilt before - so I'm learning. And I know I can not mess up his shirts. They are one of a kind and irreplaceable. So I'm putting stress & pressure on myself! Ackkk!

    When I work with the kids on Wednesday nights at my church I had one girl who had to have everything perfect. She stressed over the perfect colors to use on coloring sheets, staying in the lines, etc etc etc. IMO, it took the joy out of it for her. I talked & gently teased her about just letting go & having fun with things. I told her there are no mistakes in arts & crafts - just creative opportunities. She & I still talk & tease about her need for perfection - but I think she learned to relax and enjoy being creative. She is still a straight A student with lots of achievements - but I think she is enjoying the ride more now.

    To quilt is human, to finish is Divine.

    Donna Mc
    Last edited by QuiltnNan; 06-10-2019 at 02:45 AM. Reason: shouting/all caps

  11. #61
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    Mousie, do you save the butter wrappers to grease the bottom of your baking pans?

  12. #62
    Super Member gramajo's Avatar
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    Thank you all for your prayers.

  13. #63
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    Put me down for both. If I've done something to the best of my ability, given my skill level and the equipment I'm working with............then I've done it to "perfection" in my mind. If I've done something to the best of my ability, given my skill level and equipment................then I've done it "good enough" in my mind.

    Jim

  14. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by gramajo View Post
    Thank you all for your prayers.
    Gramajo, I'll add you to my prayer list as well. I'm so sorry about your cancer.

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    It’ll never be noticed on a galloping horse and that’s the only kind I ride.

  16. #66
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    Gramajo, I was saddened when I read your post this morning. I, too, will be praying for you...xoxo
    attitude is everything...the rest will fall into place.

  17. #67
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    Love reading about how perfect should perfect be! While I have been sewing since I was 12, I only started quilting four years ago. I take classes and feel I learn something new each time, or I am reminded of the tips and tricks from previous class. I made a list of projects started and try to finish them all, but at this point nothing is anywhere near perfect once I get past the first block. I chalk it up to my learning status! How long can I hang onto the my beginner mantra?

  18. #68
    Super Member SusieQOH's Avatar
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    I'm not a perfectionist by any standards but I do notice that when I make a quilt I always find something about it that I don't like. However, once it's finished and time passes I tend to forget about whatever bugged me. I'm like that about a lot of things.
    I've also noticed that non-quilters don't see mistakes unless they are glaring and mine aren't quite that bad!
    Around the house I'm laid back. I'd like everything a lot tidier than it is but lack the ambition to do it! I'd much rather be sewing or gardening.

  19. #69
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    I just try to do the best I can. Some days things just don't want to go my way.

  20. #70
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    If it really bothers me, I change it. If it doesn't bother me, I don't.
    PACE - Positive Attitude Changes Everything

    "All things are literally better, lovlier, and more beloved for the imperfections that reflect the human effort that went into their making."

  21. #71
    Super Member IrishgalfromNJ's Avatar
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    I call myself a hobby quilter. Nothing I make by hand is perfect and I'm okay with that. I'm just happy I have time to make things and have an outlet for my creativity.
    Everyone can't be Irish, somebody has to drive.

  22. #72
    Senior Member Blueridgebeverly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SusieQOH View Post
    I'm not a perfectionist by any standards but I do notice that when I make a quilt I always find something about it that I don't like. However, once it's finished and time passes I tend to forget about whatever bugged me. I'm like that about a lot of things.
    I've also noticed that non-quilters don't see mistakes unless they are glaring and mine aren't quite that bad!
    Around the house I'm laid back. I'd like everything a lot tidier than it is but lack the ambition to do it! I'd much rather be sewing or gardening.
    Me too! Sewing or gardening, or reading a good book. I remember a high school friend in a odd little compliment asked how I managed to live with ‘not so great.’ She said she had trouble getting out of bed in the morning because she was afraid she wouldn’t do things perfectly or be the best. My reaction was, “Wow! You are so brave. I wouldn’t have the courage to face that stress daily.” Years and years later my DSL asked me how did I manage to be so spontaneous. She was struggling with knowing a thing should be done the right way and wondered how I didn’t mind doing it the wrong way. (Tee hee) I think we all are motivated by different things. Me? Gosh, I just love learning. I think I’m motivated by curiosity. I like to try my hand at things but probably don’t master many things. But I do try to do things well.......just not to perfection?

    Very interesting thread. I enjoyed reading the thoughts of others.

  23. #73
    Super Member katiebear1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cathyvv View Post
    Definitely a 'good-enoughist. Mmy motto is "Done is better than perfect".
    Oh, I agree. I would never get anything done if I were a perfectionist.

  24. #74
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    If I waited for perfection, I'd never finish anything! I do the very best I can, and for me, that's good enough!! I think too that we are all our own worst critics!

  25. #75
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    Quote Originally Posted by cindi View Post
    If you can’t see your mistakes from 6 feet away on a galloping horse, it’s perfect as far as I’m concerned.
    Cindi, that's hilarious!

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