GreatStarter

Speaking from personal experience-do not let him do what he wants!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was away on a trip and my dh and his friend decided to tear out a wall between two rooms so he and I could share my painting/sewing room and his woodcarving. Think about this- wood dust getting into sewing machines, into wet paint...etc.
I returned home to find out they didn't empty the room, only threw one plastic sheet over the top of my machines, paints, etc. They ruined my serger and sewing machine due to the old horse hair plaster dust that got into the machines. He got these rusted metal cabinets that were thrown out someplace and covered my only available walls with them. They are totally a waste of space and ended up ruining my crafting room. Then when I refused to let him make a center island for me (the way he wanted it) he stopped working on the room. To this day (about 10 yrs later) I rarely can use my craft room. I had to buy new machines, and our marriage is still suffering due to my frustration over now having to lug my machines out into the dining room or living room whenever I want to sew/quilt.
This room must be what you need or redoing it will be a waste. Somehow tell your husband how much you appreciate his sharing his ideas. Many will probably be great, however you want it done so it will be the most useable for YOU!!!! And don't go away when he is working on YOUR room.(my dh tore out the wall as a surprise-imagine how pleased I was to return home to ruined projects and machines)
Good luck and I hope your room turns out great.

Kat

Scraps

genius!!! :-)

Carie

I am so sorry to read this - my sympathies to you - what in the world was he thinking/or not thinking! Take care of yourself - most important to your well-being, both mentally and physically.

nhweaver

I can understand the retired DH, I am living with one. But (and it is a big but), if he doesn't begin to learn to not manage you now, it will not get better. We are 5 years retired together, and has been a learning experience for both of us. We now have "hands off" zones. I don't mess with his basement workshop and garage, and he doesn't mess with our office/my sewing room. We have grown closer together when I realize that for years he directed entire branches of locations, and was at a loss when he was downsized.
Talk it through, one night while relaxing, maybe he needs a "hands off" area too.

valleyquiltermo

I wanted to buy a medal building about 40' by 60' for my quilting studio. My DH on ther other hand wanted to move an old chicken house from the other side of our land and have it rebuilt here. It is 25' by 26' and cost him twice as much as the building I wanted, with way less space. He was very surprised at what it cost him. LOL. I'm now in the process of building our home. The whole up stairs will be my studio. about 1200 sq foot. He wanted a basement and thats where he will live. Since I sew a lot I'll be living in the upstairs studio most the time. I really don't like basements.

Sunnye

Yeah, mine butted into MY room too. I wanted to scream! I did go with a soft grey on the walls because I didn't want to get any color reflection from the wall color onto my fabrics, NOT because he is afraid of color. I went with the closet doors I wanted because of the space constrictions, NOT because he doesn't like the kind I wanted. I did let him put some french doors on one wall even though I wanted the wall space. He is "letting me" put things in front of the doors to suit my needs; he just thought it'd be better for resale purposes, which I can see, I guess and I did it grudgingly.

So my advice is to listen to him and do what you want, if possible. Don't let him get HIS way with everything but maybe compromise where you can. It IS YOUR ROOM. Good luck.

Jan in VA

Perhaps you could explain you took this problem to your friends on the board and you'd like him to read what you wrote and how they responded. Sometimes one can "hear" from someone else what they can not hear from you.

A reminder, "macho" should not mean inflexible, but confident. Confident in his abilities while still listening to your desires.

Jan in VA

lfw045

Men can be such babies and usually it is us that let them be that way.....lol! Gently tell him what you want and why you want it and let it ride. I tend to just say "forget it" because I don't like the confrontation but I am slowly realizing that I have missed out on somethings that I really wanted or wanted to do so I am learning to forgo the "forget it" mentality and be honest with myself and voice what I want. Gets me in trouble sometimes...but I am finding that it is worht it....lol!

Jennie and Me

I feel for you. Since my hubby retired he tends to try to micro-manage me at times and it gets on that one final nerve that I have left. He needs a hobby of his own. Hope you can win him over to your way of thinking.

Edie

I think that the bones of the project can be done by your husband, being that he has the expertise when it comes to the building and being able to carry the stuff. You have the expertise in what you do and that is the finishing. If I had the room I would be forever grateful for what he could do to get it set up and put together and no doubt he would be grateful for not having to fold fabric, hang rulers, etc. Be God-thankful he even wants to help you and that you have him able to help you. Edie