what do you say when you give a gift, and reciepiant says
#31
Power Poster
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MN
Posts: 24,659
My Mom used to make 'rag rugs' out of yardage - they were beautiful -
She learned early on to NOT take other people's 'stuff' - (there were two exceptions that I know of - and she totally reworked what she received )
She learned early on to NOT take other people's 'stuff' - (there were two exceptions that I know of - and she totally reworked what she received )
#33
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: The California Hills
Posts: 626
That is better than my FIL's comment after I gave him a quilt last Christmas--"Save your money and time and get one from WalMart next time". Of course, that will be the only quilt he will get from me!!! Earlier this year, I worked really hard on a special quilt for my mom's birthday and she didn't even fully unfold it to look at it when I gave it to her a few months ago. She just informed me last week that the cat has claimed the quilt for itself. Wow, that was not good to hear. I really make these for the fun of the process so I have to keep that in mind, but I won't be giving any more away as gifts. I don't have gift receipients that would appreciate them.
#35
Super Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Myrtle Beach, SC
Posts: 8,139
My view is that once I've given a quilt to someone, it is theirs to use or abuse.
Seems to me that the cat might have better taste in quilts than your Mom! (Lol)
Your FIL may be one of those folks who doesn't like people showing him any kind of special attention or who doesn't know how to say thank you. Sad for him, and, in this case, sad for you.
Seems to me that the cat might have better taste in quilts than your Mom! (Lol)
Your FIL may be one of those folks who doesn't like people showing him any kind of special attention or who doesn't know how to say thank you. Sad for him, and, in this case, sad for you.
#36
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: The California Hills
Posts: 626
cathyvv, you have completely nailed my FIL 100%. You must be very intuitive about people and their personalities. He is quite generous but hates to receive anything from anyone, even just a thanks for his generousity.
#37
Power Poster
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MN
Posts: 24,659
#38
I hear you lynnie and I feel your pain. Remember the movie Fiddler on the Roof? I talk in the second person sometimes to my family. (Kinda like her made up dreams) I mention how so and so had this happen to them when presenting a quilt they had made. Then I say something about I can't believe how terrible that was. Oh I go on and on. LOL...
That helps them to understand that I value my work and they should too. I do a ton of charity sewing for the diabetic kids silent auction and there are so many people out there that just don't get the money, hours and labor it takes to make something look professional.
The thing is, the "professionals" work with two hands just like us. We don't have the equipment they have, but, dang it, we sure can make something beautiful without all that, huh?
As for the fabric, I wouldn't hurt thier feelings. They thought of me and made the effort to bring it to me. But.. I would, just like so many others, donate it for someone else to enjoy.
That helps them to understand that I value my work and they should too. I do a ton of charity sewing for the diabetic kids silent auction and there are so many people out there that just don't get the money, hours and labor it takes to make something look professional.
The thing is, the "professionals" work with two hands just like us. We don't have the equipment they have, but, dang it, we sure can make something beautiful without all that, huh?
As for the fabric, I wouldn't hurt thier feelings. They thought of me and made the effort to bring it to me. But.. I would, just like so many others, donate it for someone else to enjoy.
#39
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Southern Illinois (also HI, OR, WA, TX, CA, MO, etc.)
Posts: 25
The worst one yet was when a dear lady made a beautiful quilt for her granddaughter's wedding gift. Her granddaughter said she didn't like it & would rather have cash. Taken aback, this wonderful quilter donated it as the grand prize for our annual quilt raffle. She died just before the granddaughter's wedding. The girl then had the audacity to ask the guild to give it to her. The raffle winner loved it and happily and proudly displays it in her home on her bed.
#40
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Indiana
Posts: 450
Different strokes for different folks. I view thank you notes as something you send when you can't communicate directly with the giver. I really don't like getting them unless I mailed a gift to someone and need to know it arrived. If a family member I made a quilt for sent me one I would be hurt that we weren't close enough for them to take the time to call me and tell me thank you.
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