ctquilter

I agree with gcathie and dunster. IMHO your son and DIL really do appreciate
your hard work because the quilt is still on their bed holes and all!

patricej

some important facts stand out for me.

(1) she did say they felt terrible about what happened to the quilt. in their shoes, i might also have put off telling you what had happened until i had no choice. we might all be grown, but i'll bet most of us are still kids when it comes to our parents. (i'm waaaaaaaaay not 25 anymore, but my father is still Daddy. ;-) )
(2) it's difficult to believe they'd have left that quilt on the bed if they knew what the dog would do to it.
(3) they didn't throw the quilt away. they not only kept it - holes and all - what's left of it is still displayed on the bed. is it possible that they still treasure it and all the memories it now represents?

sunnyhope

I would either leave the quilt there and NEVER ever make something for them again.

Or i would take the quilt with me home and repair it if and when you fancy doing so but i would still not never make anything for ppl that are so careless like they seem to be.

When you get something you know someone has spent a long time making for you the least thing you do is to take care of it.

I d be furious with him if i was you, actually i d be tempted to kill him and give him a extremely good seeing too.

Do not let ppl treat you and ur crafts like this, you are way too good for that.

Sending you loads of hugs

wesing

Elaine -

I'm going to wade in with a guy's perspective here. It was still on the bed, and he elected not to tell you. I'm guessing he was sick about it also and didn't want to hurt your feelings by asking for a repair, but it still meant enough to him to continue using it. And, he used it even though it's usefulness and durability were compromised. Remember the best-loved quilts will not end up in a museum; they will end their lives threadbare and finally thrown away when they literally fall apart in the washer.

Once you give a gift, it isn't yours anymore. If the recipient loves it and uses it, that's a great compliment to you. If they sell it in the garage sale or pack it in the attic, well, you made a legitimate effort and they didn't like the gift as much as you thought. It's the thought that counts, right?

Try to think of it this way: What if he came to you in ten years and said "Mom, I love this quilt, but it's been on the bed so long and been washed so many times the stuffing is coming out. What should I do now? Could you make me another one?" I'm sure your heart would melt and you'd rush to the fabric store! This one just got "worn out" earlier than either of you expected. Now that he knows you know about the holes, he may ask for a repair. If he does just smile and do the best you can knowing he still wants to use the quilt.

Sorry if this sounds preachy, but I have relatives who don't take care of things either. I also have a relative who is mortally insulted if she gives me something and I don't use/wear it the way she thinks I should. So believe me when I tell you I understand both sides of this equation. You have the advantage because you can get your joy from the creating and giving.

Darren

Vickymomof6

If they didn't come to you and tell you about it maybe they felt really bad and were trying to not hurt your feelings. I would come right out and ask him if he would like it fixed.

Vicky

pittsburgpam

I would be sick about it too and sorry that happened. Take comfort that they didn't mean for that to happen. It's not like they took it out to the yard for the kids to play with and then left it for the dog.

It was an unforseen accident and they too are sorry it happened. I would repair it and give it back. It might take years for that to get done but if it is not repaired and is still being used it's not going to last as long as it could.

kluedesigns

once you give it to someone its in their charge. you can't give them a hard time over it and take it back to fix it.

if you don't think they appreciate your efforts then don't do it anymore.

quiltswithdogs

Purple, you must be so sad. It's not the dog's fault. It's his for not training his dog out of separation anxiety behavior as well as not thinking to take the quilt off the bed. Too bad it wasn't his guitar or something he made. I think that if he didn't ask you to repair it, don't offer. If he does, say you are sorry but you just hate to repair so must say no because you are currently so busy with new projects. If he wants a new quilt, you can say you'll think about it ...but then, secretly start planning one for his next big occasion ie 40th BD! It will be a happy project. After such a long wait, when you present it to him at his party, he will be surprised and humbled and so grateful, he will treat it with much more care.

That's what I quickly thought up without even knowing you and I realize it may not be the advise best suited for you.

BellaBoo

I know exactly how you feel. Been there. Now when one of my kids ask me to make them a quilt/wallhanging/placemats, etc. I tell them sure. Go buy the fabric, thread, book or pattern or give me the money to buy it and I'll make it. If they have money in it they will take better care of it. I demand quilt shop fabric too! I seldom make anything other then utility quilts for non quilters.

Tink's Mom

I also have a careless adult son...something similar happened to the quilt I made him a few years ago...
He brought the quilt over to be washed, (yes, he still does his laundry here) and says, Mom, the dog was chewing the other day and you need to repair the quilt you made....I asked how the dog got at it and he had folded it up so that it was a nice comfy bed for the dog....
I repaired it....I took 12" squares of fabric top and bottom and turned the edges under and stitched it over the holes and made an X to hold it in place.....

He held it up, and looked at it....never said anything but, Thanks...I think his red cheeks :oops: said all that was neccessary....P.S. it is still being used.....