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  • How can I overcome my fear?

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    Old 12-13-2010, 02:23 AM
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    I love creating and sharing with others, however now I am hesitatant to do this when it comes to quilts. My grandson is engaged to a sweet young lady, and I would love to make her a lap quilt. However the last quilt that I made it for my granddaughter. She was 17 at the time. I spent quite a while creating the quilt. Well, I was over at their house one day and while going out to the back patio I spotted her quilt just laying on the ground outside. It was quite apparent it had been there for a while. I was hearbroken, to see how it was disregarded. Ever since then I am unable to bring myself to commit to gifting a quilt. I keep trying to get past it, but it is so hard. I would love to make more quilts but I just keep thinking about the work and the lack of appreciation. Any suggestions on how I can get over this? This is the quilt that I made for my granddaughter..thanks for any suggestions.
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    Old 12-13-2010, 02:31 AM
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    I keep it firmly in my mind that once it is given, it is no longer mine, and the recipient has the right to do with it what they choose - even mis-treat it :( . With that said, I only make quilts for those I know will appreciate it...my mother in law cried tears of happiness when presented with her Christmas gift quilt this year (we celebrated early). I do not want any given quilt to be "saved" for special occasions...I want them used and loved "to death". Mistreatment does hurt my quilter's soul, but love and use to the very last thread warms it.
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    Old 12-13-2010, 02:44 AM
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    How about a little note with the quilt at the time you give it? 'Please enjoy this gift, but don't mistreat it, because it took me xxx hours to make it with love for you'.
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    Old 12-13-2010, 02:48 AM
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    I agree with deema. Once it is given, it is a gift and theirs to do whatever with. But, when or if I see one of my quilts given as a gift, misused, that person will never get another quilt from me.

    How many people do you think would LOVE a homemade quilt? You giving is awesome and most people realize that.

    Don't let one person ruin your love of quilting and sharing.

    It is kind of like riding a horse, sometimes you fall off but you get back on! You shouldn't feel the way you do because of one person.

    "Let no man or woman rob you of your joy". I am sorry about the way she treated you quilt though.
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    Old 12-13-2010, 03:02 AM
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    Maybe she has not fully understood all that went into making that quilt maybe when older she will fill bad for treating a piece of art the way she has done.
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    Old 12-13-2010, 04:01 AM
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    I can imagine how you feel. I am very hesitant in giving my quilts away, I have not given that many away lately, I am keeping them. Has this stopped me from quilting, no. It is kind of heartbreaking. I remember a lady telling me some time ago, she gave a quilt to her nephew, she was over there and it was laying on the garage floor for the dog. If I keep them all, my kids can figure out what to do with them some day.
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    Old 12-13-2010, 04:04 AM
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    I gave one once (just a wall hanging) and found it in there yard sale later!
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    Old 12-13-2010, 04:15 AM
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    Wow,This had to really hurt, a handmade gift truly comes from the heart and I am not sure those that do not make things understand the work and feeling that goes into the gift.
    This really makes me hesitate to make the 6 I was going to start on for me neices and nephews. I certianly wont be putting a lot of work into them.
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    Old 12-13-2010, 04:17 AM
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    I'm sorry your quilt was mistreated. I know she didn't intentionally try to hurt your feelings. I think most people who are not crafters (in general) don't realize the time and of course the expense in making something. I find in most of my crafting, in alot of instances, it would be cheaper to buy it premade..... but that's the point. You don't get exactly what you want.

    Depending on who it is given to, I have actually written the hours to make it on the quilt label. I have a very busy lifestyle. I think when they can see how much time you spend for them, versus doing other things, they have a better appreciation of the gift.

    I agree with everyone else, just move on to the next project and enjoy the experience. ;)
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    Old 12-13-2010, 04:44 AM
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    Originally Posted by Lacelady
    How about a little note with the quilt at the time you give it? 'Please enjoy this gift, but don't mistreat it, because it took me xxx hours to make it with love for you'.
    I agree with Lacelady - especially if it's family or close friends. Even in conversation with the GD you could ask her how the quilt is doing, is it keeping her warm enough, is she taking care of it, is it holding up well? I'd also tell the recipients to let me know if something starts to come apart because 'a stitch in time - saves nine'.
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