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Thread: Our friend's dogs are too rowdy

  1. #1
    diogirl's Avatar
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    Ok I like dogs. I've owned them most of my life. I don't currently own one. The situation here is this. Me and my husband's friends have 3. Two Boston Terriors and a Dobermin. When we go to there house, their dogs are all over the place jumping on us and climbing all over us when we sit on their couch. They slober on you and nudge you with their wet noses. I have to constantly wash my hands. I don't want to be rude but I want to ask them to control their dogs and put them in their pins when we are there. It's at the point that I don't like going over there because of their dogs. I don't think the dogs should have run of the house but they do, getting on the couches with their slobbery toys. I feel horrible feeling this way but I think that if you are having company over, you should make them feel welcome and control your animals. I understand that lots of people see their dogs as family and thats fine, but when you have company over, you should take their feelings into consideration. After all, they are your guests. What do you suggest? Should I ask them? I don't want to offend them but at the same time, I'm running out of reasons why I'm busy when they ask us to come over. :-(

  2. #2
    Power Poster sueisallaboutquilts's Avatar
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    That sounds like total chaos!!! I love dogs but it sounds like they aren't disciplined at all.
    I don't blame you but have no idea except to tell them the truth (kindly of course)
    I feel that pets are family but we disciplined our children too! lol

  3. #3
    Super Member Vicki W's Avatar
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    If you enjoy their company, invite them to your house and you won't have to worry about the dogs.

    If/when the opportunity comes up, I would bring it up and share that it bothers you. It really depends on how close you are and how much you value the relationship. You are right, it is necessary to tread carefully to keep from hurting feelings. But you need to share your feelings as well otherwise you will become resentful.

  4. #4
    Magdalena's Avatar
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    Be honest. I have three cats and although they are cats, one of them acts like a dog. So, being that some of my guest have allergies, I do make sure that my cats are in a safe and comfortable environment and I love making sure my family or guest are comfortable. I do like the fact that we are all having a good time. I am thankful that my guest are honest and let me know their concerns, that what friends and family do.

  5. #5
    Super Member KathyAire's Avatar
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    When friends come to my house, I put my dogs in the bedroom and put up a baby gate. There are a few people that come and are truly dog people. The dogs know it, they greet them and then they settle down.

    That said, your friends know how their dogs act. If I were in your shoes, I wouldn't go to their house. The dogs live there. The owners know the dogs are rowdy. They don't do anything about it. End of story. If you want to visit with them, invite them to your house instead.

  6. #6
    Super Member Quiltforme's Avatar
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    Start inviting them to your home she needs to know her dogs are bothering you. To her that is normal behavior she probably has No ideathat they bother you I could not stay there I have germ issues.
    Good luck!

  7. #7
    Super Member Chasing Hawk's Avatar
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    Sounds like the dogs are the pack leaders. It will take a lot of work on their part to reverse the situation but it is possible.

  8. #8
    Senior Member cinnya's Avatar
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    What if you invite them to your house............................................. ....and they bring the dogs :shock: :shock:

  9. #9
    Super Member ptquilts's Avatar
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    I know how you feel, I had to drop an acquaintance/friend because of her obnoxious dog. Just couldn't stand to go over there and was afraid to invite her over cause she would prob. want to bring the dog. How do you invite someone and say "but not your dog..."

  10. #10
    Super Member SuziC's Avatar
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    If they are good friends, i would tell them how you feel. I myself have 3 very large dogs and NEVER let them make company feel like that. They have their own places in my house and outside. Some people have asked us "where are your dogs" because i don't let them "maul" anyone. Honesty is always best.

  11. #11
    Super Member Maride's Avatar
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    I don't like it when my own dog gets me wet with his nose or his toys. I put him away when we have company and he has learned to go away when ignored. I would be honest to your friends and tell them how you feel about the dog.

  12. #12
    Power Poster nativetexan's Avatar
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    I love dogs but don't have any. if i visit i wouldn't want them slobbering on me either. if the people can't put them in another room, stop visiting. that is probably the only thing you can do.
    or call that Victoria lady from It's Me or The Dog show to go show them how to train their dogs to have some good manners.

  13. #13
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    We always had rescue Dobermans, from one to 3 at a time, and I was pack leader. I was boss of them, and they behaved sometimes far better than my kids!! When company came, it was their job to inform me of that fact, then when I let them in, they would be told they were friends, and then they (the dogs, of course) had to go lie down or go "OUT" back.
    If you don't have discipline for either kids or dogs, you are very shortly going to have some big, powerful juvenile delinquents on your hands, and nobody loves a brat. Mine were so well mannered (brag) that when one teen daughter baby sat in a not so good neighborhood, the parents, who had met him, ask if she could bring Kurt with her!! He was even asked to visit the Preschool my little boy was going to then. The real mean one in our family was our black, half Siamese cat!

  14. #14
    Super Member patchsamkim's Avatar
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    I always have our dog go to his pen when I have company over...he is big...70 pounds and loves people...too much...and it is so much easier having him there than trying to stop him from trying to get attention from my visitors.

  15. #15
    diogirl's Avatar
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    They are our social friends and we live about 40 minutes apart. I try to alternate between us going over there and them coming over to our house but 3 out of 5 times we end up going over there. I think honestly they just don't want to leave their dogs and that they don't want to make the drive. So even when we invite them over usually it ends up us going over there. It's getting old but he is best friends with my hubby so hubby gives in. So I have to suck it up and put up with the dogs.. :(

  16. #16
    Super Member Rainy Day's Avatar
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    Get some dog repelling odor, like citronella, and put it on your feet or shoes!

  17. #17
    Super Member lalaland's Avatar
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    I did kind of a brazen thing once, but it worked. My neighbors have a big dog, 120 lbs., her name is Happy and she's all that her name implies. I love my neighbors, and I love dogs, but Happy would jump up on me and quite frankly, she was just too darn big and my neighbors had a devil of a time controlling her so.............one day I brought my dog's training tool, it's called Pet Agree, emits a sound only a dog can hear, you press it, say your command, they get it fairly quickly, etc. I used it twice on Happy, after that, when I went to visit the neighbors and all 120 lbs. of her would bound merrily in my direction, all I had to say was NO and she stopped, sat, and I was able to give her a good dose of love and attention. My neighbors did not take offense either.

  18. #18
    Super Member JulieR's Avatar
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    I wouldn't say a word. Why can't you meet for dinner and a movie somewhere between your locations? They won't have to come all the way to you (leaving the dogs alone for too long) and you won't have to tolerate their dogs.

    I don't chastise my friends who have bratty, destructive children; I also don't blame my friends who are allergic to my cats or afraid of my dogs. I just find other ways to see them so we can all enjoy ourselves.

    PS - We pet moms need a break sometimes, too. :lol:

  19. #19
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    That's too bad. I have the same problem and she's my best friend! I don't go over there much because of that plUs with so many dogs6, plus cat, birds, ferret there is a lot of hair and house smells like animals. I make food and they come over. If I have gone over I try to suck it up but don't stay long because I also have asthma. I do spoil them and send over treats. When they come over I would NOT allow my dOg jump all over anymore than I would let my kids. Hard because I love her and family dearly !!

  20. #20
    Super Member janedee's Avatar
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    tricky situation - hope you feel you can mention it to your friends without it sounding like a criticism perhaps you could make a bit of a joke about it!! I too love dogs but couldn't cope with that - if mine doesn't settle within 10 mins out she goes she soon gets the message

  21. #21
    Senior Member Boxer mom's Avatar
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    I feel you, I am in the same boat with my dogs. I have 2 boxers and I have tried everything and they just refuse to be have and calm down so, they get put in their kennels when company comes over. I tell my company to not feed the frenzy by telling them no and being firm with them and they just keep saying "no it's okay" when it is not. They don't seem to understand that I need their help to stop this kind of behavior and them not being firm with them is not helping me.

    I am not sure how you would need to address this. Sorry.

  22. #22
    Senior Member Carol Wilson's Avatar
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    Could I please borrow your dogs.

    I have a problem with a certain 2 visitors that constantly drop in uninvited who constantly find fault with everything I do including my quilting, saying that it is a total waste of time, always being negative about everything and everybody, unfortunately in Australia we have very strict quarantine laws so it may take some time to get them here, but it sounds like it would well be worth the wait!

    :D

  23. #23
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    It sounds like your friends don't discipline their dogs. Dogs need to be socialized and trained. They don't have to be beaten but they do need discipline just like children.

  24. #24
    Super Member ssgramma's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ptquilts
    I know how you feel, I had to drop an acquaintance/friend because of her obnoxious dog. Just couldn't stand to go over there and was afraid to invite her over cause she would prob. want to bring the dog. How do you invite someone and say "but not your dog..."
    Just say it!!! Step-kids both thought they should be able to bring dogs to my house. I have cats. Their dogs are NOT welcome. SD showed up once with her dog who spent the weekend confined to backyard or her van. He is a very nice dog but was NOT allowed in my house. She never brought him again! SS got told not to come if he didn't have arrangements for doggie care at home!

    I have had cats for a long time. Petsitters and/or friends are there so that I don't have to annoy people with my animals! That is also why we have a camper. Cats can go along but not bother anyone by intruding into their home!!!

  25. #25
    Super Member Yooper32's Avatar
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    Unruly dogs and unruly kids, same difference. I have a hard time with both. My dogs had to behave as did my children but like a lot of things, that seems to have passed into the past. Do I sound like a grouchy ol' lady? Well, I am when I have to put up with any of the above.

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