Annaquilts

I am sorry to hear about the quilt for your grand daughter. I am not sure why some people are that way. Hugs!

FranW

We make quilts because we have to - the need comes from deep inside and quilting makes us feel good. I am sorry that your quilt was mistreated and I do understand your sadness. Keep making quilts and when the time is right to gift them, you will know. Just enjoy the process.
I have three quilts that I simply cannot part with for one reason or another. Many others I have gifted to others or donated to charity. I hope that all "my quilts" are doing well, but in many cases I honestly do not know what happened to them. They are "hugs" that I have given away.

jdiane318

Just imagine the children and abused women who would appreciate something so precious. As a Project Linus coordinator, many of the children we serve have never owned their own blanket before and it becomes a milestone in their young lives. When children are allowed to select blankets and they have siblings, those children try to help the younger ones pick their first. I agree that once a quilt is given, there are no strings. But if you see that there is no appreciation, make a mental note. I used to crochet afghans and I still remember seeing one that was given to a dear friend, outside her home where her older boys had run over it time and time again with their vehicles. Then one day she asked me how to wash it. If you are looking to be appreciated, channel your energies towards some of the non-profit groups in your area. Our chapter of Project Linus knows that we make a difference one stitch at a time.

sewingsuz

I have this same poblem because of prior treatment of others. How do you get over this? I do think the note is a good Idea. Thanks

raksmum

I would just tell her that you would like to make her a quilt but aren't sure if she even likes them or wants one and you wouldn't want to make something for her that she doesn't want. If she says she wants one then I wouldn't hesitate to tell her about your granddaughters quilt. She will then know that you want her to use it but not abuse it. Make sure to tell her to be honest and if she doesn`t want one you won`t be hurt.

joyceinoh

I remember the first quilts I made I gave to the grand kids for their Christmas one year. the girl 8, told me several times how she liked hers and how warm it was. one day when I was there The 3 yr old went and got his and said, you gave me this, did you grandma? and i said Yes, and he said. "I love you grandma.". Made it all worth while. :thumbup: :lol:
As for making more quilts, make them and put them back for those special occassions like baby showers, or wedding.

BizzieLizzie

I have exactly the same reservations as yourself. I made a few cushion covers a few years ago to help my children's school raise funds. I mentioned to the lady who was organising it that they could ask for about £15 for the complete cushion. When I went to have a look at them in the stall, they were going for £5 each and later a few of them were put aside for the staff to take away for free! Needless to say, I never gave anything away for free to anyone for fund raising again!

I have made a number of quilts since, mainly for colleagues and friends who are having babies and I always say to them that I have spent time making them and if they do not want them after a while, I would gladly take them over for £5-10,( that is, I would pay to have them back!) and I would drive out to collect them. This is just a little incentive to make sure my efforts will not be wasted. Also if they rip, I ask them to return the quilts to me for repairs. Every so often I follow up on them.

It is hard to part with these lovely creations especially since there is so little regard from some but I sometimes think that people do things without realising the significance but if you can talk to them and mention your thoughts about things, they may 'wake up'. Your grand daughter was young and some young adults do things without thinking.

Having said this, I do agree with some of the earlier messages where once given away the quilts don't belong to us anymore but to the person who was given it and what they do is up to them but I think that it is the lack of tact/respect that is hurtful and that may be the issue here.

Would you be able to speak to your grand daughter and ask if you can have it back to see if it can be salvaged? I think that if I were in your position, I would ask if I could have a look to see if it needed some TLC. Would that make it feel less hurtful? Only you can answer the question.

I think that, like you , I have to remember that everyone is different. Perhaps you can gauge by your grandson's fiance's reaction should you mention your intention to make her a gift of a quilt.

Recently I said to my colleagues that I was thinking of making a few small pieces for each of them and one of my colleagues was thrilled to bits! I certainly was not expecting her enthusiasm! I was bowled over. LOL. So I know that she will look after what I make her.

Best wishes. I hope that things will be better for you soon. Please let us know how things get on. Take care.


(Sorry for the LONG message :lol: )

candi

I think we just need to understand that not everyone likes everything.. even precious things like quilts. As a new quilter, I keep telling myself even though I am excited about my new hobby, and there are 10 million things I want to make, I need to not assume that just because I am loving something, everyone else has to. I would ask the person that I am thinking about gifting a quilt if they would like one and if they say yes, go ahead and ask them what colors, style or whatever, if they get involved in the process, I am sure the end product will be to their liking and they will enjoy using it.

GailG

I haven't read all of the posts (yet), but I agree with a lot of what has been written. I think personally, I would try asking her if she would like for you to bring the quilt home to launder it. If she cares about the quilt, she will probably accept your offer or she will do something about it once you've gone. She will see how much you value her quilt. If she seems not to care, then you'll just have to let it go. When she grows up, she'll probably be more appreciative.

sew wishful

I would feel the same if I saw one of the handmade quilts I'd given away, laying in the yard. I think I would have picked it up, put it in my car and taken it home and cleaned it up, put it in a bag, or box and save it until the GD is 21 to return it to her or she finally mentioned it was gone. BUT maybe she had been having a picnic on it, or lying on it sunbathing. Unless it had been rained on or had fallen off the clothesline and left there for days and days, she could have been using it outside and just forgotten to pick it up or called away to do something important and forgotten it.
It is hers to use as she pleases, but not abuse it.