When do you quit giving gifts to "kids"
#13
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Illinois
Posts: 9,312
The general "rule" in our family is once a kid has gone off to college ( or finished high school) they can participate in the adult exchange ( we draw names) or opt out , but the getting gifts from all the adults is over once in college.
I have one nephew who is always so appreciative and sends me e- mails often , and I send him a "just because" gift .. but never in the month of December.
I have one nephew who is always so appreciative and sends me e- mails often , and I send him a "just because" gift .. but never in the month of December.
#14
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Fort White, Fl
Posts: 2,689
This is how we have handled the gift situation all my life. For those that do not respond to a gift I just say well I did my part.
#15
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Bosque County, Texas
Posts: 2,709
There are a lot of things that parents did not teach kids. In fact, just ask any kid or adult: if they want to do something and they don't know how to do it, the fact that their parents did not teach them will not stop them from learning how to do it. So, it is no excuse if parents did not teach them to write thank you notes. If they wanted to say thank you, they could find the technology to do it. They certainly find the technology to write everything else. If someone if ungrateful, then that is just an ungrateful person regardless of however they excuse it as being forgetful or too busy, etc. We only have 1 GD out of 7 who has said thank you and we had to pay for part of her college to get that!
#17
I have struggled with this question for a long time. My nephew just turned 30 and the only reason that I know he got my gift was that he cashed the check. I feel that it is time for me to stop. He has an iphone so he can text, leave me a voice message or he can email me from his ipad. But on the other hand he is my only nephew. I probably will continue to send him gifts, but if my daughter ever treated her aunts or grandfather this way I would shoot her. But she is very good about saying "Thanks".
#18
No "thank you", no gift the following year. Simple. When I was growing up, my mother sat us all down at the table and we wrote hand-written thank you notes to each giver. I don't expect that...but I will tell you I have a brother who is 60 years old, married, and I have sent them very nice, hand made gifts for the past two years and not even a Christmas Card!!! Guess what I sent this year? Yep...nothing. But in the spirit of Christmas, I did send them a card. I have 3 grandchildren who have not received anything from me for several years for the same reason. It is hard to do and you usually want to cave at the last minute, but come on! Just a thank you is too much? Please! I figure, they either don't like me, don't like what I send or are just very ill mannered. In my brother's case, I KNOW he was taught better, he was at the kitchen table writting notes just like I was. So...that is it for me. I hope all the ill mannered, thoughtless people read this, but they will think it is not about them...lol.
#19
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: dallas tx.
Posts: 5,172
Well said ckcowl. I feel that way. We have a small family. If I know my little grandson eats his breakfast wrapped in a full quilt that I made, that's thanks enough. And they do always thank me. We are all pretty close.
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