RobertaMarie

You could ask her if she wants to come over and clean your house, do your laundry, do some yard work and run a few errands "in her spare time" and then, maybe you "might have time to think about making a quilt for her if she furnishes the fabrics and thread". Actually, I think she was paying a compliment to your work, not realizing how much time, effort and expense goes into making a quilt. When my friends ask me for a quilt, or to make one for them, I nicely tell them, "I'm sorry, but you just can't afford it," and then explain that I don't work for hire. God bless the quilt lovers, as well as the quilt makers. I am blessed having both in my life.

pumpkinpatchquilter

For the longest time I didn't want to be mean or rude and say no. I thought that if I said no to making things for others that I was being selfish...but while I appreciate that people like my quilting...I just cannot accommodate every person who asks me to make something for them, because it seems that it happens often and much of the time the people who ask have no concept or care for how much it costs me to make these things or how much time it takes. I used to dance around it and say I was just so busy but these days I just flat out say that I have limited my personal sewing to a few things here and there for my parents and my kids. I would be happy to show YOU how to do it (that means YOU come to MY house when I HAVE TIME and bring YOUR FABRIC and SUPPLIES). I try to say it with a smile and with sincerity...I long arm quilt/craft/sew for an extra income in addition to being a stay at home mother. But let me tell you I am not a "stay at home and do nothing" mother, I bust my rump on a daily basis and am exhausted in the evenings. When I have some free time to do some personal sewing I really don't want to spend it hemming so and so's pants

It IS a compliment when someone asks you to make something...but people will really take advantage if you let them. I offered to make a family member a quilt once, and they called back and requested TWO QUEEN sized quilts instead because they like to use separate blankets. I have made one family member four quilts and continue to get requests...and another family member asks me to make her one of EVERYTHING that I make. I have had family members friends that could care less about me or how my family is doing and basically treated me like hired help in making their daughter a dress...and had the nerve to complain about it afterward when I did this for absolute nothing but to be kind.

I know that sounds harsh, and I used to be really surprised to hear others say these things when I started sewing. But I have just had SO many people take advantage...and I'm much happier now that I just say, sorry, but NO! LOL*

jrhboxers

My uncle's only child reconnected with me a couple of years ago - DU died ten years ago. I posted a picture of a quilt that I made for a friend's grandbaby, and she said she didn't know that I was a quilter. I figured that since my grandmother taught me to quilt, and she passed away when cousin was little (4 or 5), I decided that she probably did need a quilt. My uncle and her mother had a very nasty divorce, and we had little contact with her after my grandmother died.
So when we were talking about the possibility of a quilt, I noticed that 'her' words were actually coming from her mom. She said that she would pay for the fabric and stuff - yeah right. So I found a pattern that I liked that wasn't really hard or anything, and told her what fabrics I needed. I thought when she saw how much the fabrics alone cost, she would change her mind. But no, she sent fabric. The only issue is that she sent THREE sets of fabric (the pattern called for a Layer Cake and a Jelly Roll). She said that she couldn't make up her mind.
Anyway, I sent her a wish list from the Fat Quarter Shop that listed all of the border and backing fabrics, along with the batting. I told her that when I get the rest of the fabrics, I can but her in line to be pieced. And I am having a friend LAQ them (at her expense of course). So, I figure in tribute to my grandmother, I can piece and bind a couple (ok, three) quilts for her youngest granddaughter. But she knows that there is no time frame and if it takes two years, it takes two years.

Boston1954

Oh, you are priceless!! I love it!

The trouble is when people ask for a quilt by your hands, they are thinking it will be done in three weeks, and some even expect it to be free. My sister is a quilter herself, and I have made her 7 quilts and gave her 3 completed tops as well. She keeps asking for more. She should know better.

judijade

I have a granddaughter that has 3 bed sized quilts of her own and at least 6 baby/children's quilts that i have made her and her family. I have never seen a single one of them in use in her home and she has never acknowledged that she received them. Now she has had her mother ask me why her newest baby hadn't received baby quilts yet.

I"m really at a loss for what to say. But I'm not sending anymore in that direction.

ptquilts

you know, you can always say, "It takes me about 20 hours (or whatever it takes you) to make a quilt - can you give me that many hours of your time to help with (cooking, filing taxes, yard work) " or whatever their skills are. Bet they back off fast!!

BertieD

I think DNP is double nine patch

QuiltingHaven

Okay, my 2 cents. We all know how much time and effort it takes us to make a quilt soooo..... I would say yes, (if she was a really good friend) I might have one if you would be willing to just pay for the material, thread and batting that it cost to make it. You could say "I have put in about 120 (however many you did spend) hours creating the quilt and since you are such a dear friend, I have one that if you are willing to pay just for the materials, I would love for you to have it." Then, when she says yes, and you tell her the fabric/batting/pattern alone costs (oh about) $150.00. She will then pass out and never bother you again. Unless they do it, most people have not idea what "we quilters" all realize about the cost of materials, the time we work on a quilt, and the detail we put in our "love of quilting".

Scissor Queen

I figured out many, many years ago people can't walk on you if you don't lay down and let them. I can say no without even blinking an eye.

pal

How about "You're joking, right????" Then if they say that they are not joking, you say "Do you know what goes in to making a quilt?" Then, tell them. yada, yada, yada........ Problem solved. I think it is incredibly nervy for someone to ask you to give up your time when they have just as much time as you do. (mabe that makes me a Stinkweed, I don't know)