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Thread: How would you want someone to react?

  1. #1
    Super Member urgodschild2's Avatar
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    How would you want someone to react?

    I was wondering after reading the post on people not appreciating the quilts we make. I know the hard work, creativity, and joy that goes into making my quilts and to give it to someone who just doesn't respond is very disappointing. But I was wondering....what if someone made me a quilt that was all the wrong colors or design for me. How would I react??? Of course I would be very appreciated because I know the work involved and also how nice of them to think of me. But I realized that I probably would put it in the closet and not look at it again. That is really not appreciating the gift. So I was wondering if there is a way for a person to tell the giver in a kind way that they don't like the colors or it is not their style and it would be better to give it to someone else who would really appreciate it. But also to be able to tell the giver that they like certain colors, quiet colors, not flowery things, or whatever their taste. I think that some people are also thinking how can this fit into the decor of their own home and that may be a reason that they act blah about the gift. I have decided that because of this post and how people have responded to it that I might be asking people about their preferences in regards to colors, etc.
    So what I was wondering was......if you received a quilt that you just could not stand colors or designs, how would your respond and what would you do with the quilt after you got it?????

  2. #2
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    Good question, I've often wondered the same thing. Quite honestly, when I see some of the quilts on here that are going to be given as gifts, all I can think of is "wow"..... and I don't mean that in a good way. Truth be told, I'll bet I'm not the only one with that response. This is going to be interesting.....

  3. #3
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    "Oh, wow, I can see all the love that went into this. Thank you for such a thoughtful gift."


    I had to do this when my elderly uncle took up quilting right after his wife died. He came to a family reunion with 15 lap size tied quilts. He used old sheets for the backing-not a problem except that he didn't cut away the hems and there's a questionable stain in one corner. What a wonderful mess it was. He thought that since he grew up with his mother quillting and all she did was cut fabric into small pieces and sew it back to together that he could do the same thing. He called me "you'lll never guess what I found up at the Walmarts...a razor blade on a stick!"

    So he cut up my aunt's entire fabric stash into ~2" squares-now my aunt did not quilt, she made clothes so there was a wide variety of fabrics to begin with.

    Then my uncle remembered that grandma would cut up all clothes to make quilts. So he cut up her entire wardrobe into 2" squares. Oh, my. It was fun looking at the squares to see what all he cut up-double knit polyester, bras, slips, upholstery fabric, pleather. He didn't remove any of the embellishments so there are little pieces of lace and beads too.

    The batting is only in the center of the quilt, he was in the beginning of raw edge quilting before they even had a name for it, he didn't bother the turn under the binding. It's a complete wreck....but I love it because he did the best he could with his knowledge. I think it helped him work through the grief of losing his wife of 50 yrs.

    It's sitting in the closet with all the other quilts that family have given me or I've made. I pull it out as an object lesson to remind me to slow down and pay attention to detail.

  4. #4
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    This is a good question. A friend of mine long armed a quilt for a lady. The quilt was a top that the lady had found stored away in a box that came from her grandmother. I have to admit that I thought the quilt was hideous and I sure wouldn't have wanted it as a gift. The fabric that was chosen as binding added to the ickness of the quilt. We asked the lady what she was going to do with it and her answer was I'm giving it to my daughter -- my very picky daughter.

    I wonder how it was received. Three of us friends who saw the quilt and appreciate quilts thought it was pretty icky. I guess I would have just smiled and then disposed of it later. We don't all like the same thing so this can be kind of tricky!

  5. #5
    Super Member luvTooQuilt's Avatar
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    The 'uglies' went into the closet.. sorry to say but since my MIL passed Ive since pulled them out and are being used everyday.... NOW i see them as beauties....

    and to answer your question: Im kinda blunt... and Ive learned this phrase from hubby: dont ask a question you dont want to hear the answer to.....

  6. #6
    Super Member Dina's Avatar
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    "Thank you, this is great!" would be all I needed to hear.

  7. #7
    Super Member AshleyR's Avatar
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    Well, even if you don't "like" something, that doesn't mean it can't keep you warm, does it? You can put it between your sheet and a quilt you love in the winter. Or hang it on the wall in a room you don't use too much. I always find the good in something and would be sure to let the quilter know that. "It's so soft and love this color! I'm going to hang it in my laundry room since I spend so much time there! It will cheer me up!"

    Trust me, if my 14-year old son can open used Tupperware containers in front of someone, you can handle a gift quilt!
    You can have any design you want. As long as it's loops!

  8. #8
    Senior Member Hinterland's Avatar
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    I've actually been in that situation, before I started quilting. My grandmother made me a pink and green quilt, with large raw-edged butterflies. This was in the 70s, and I was really disappointed - I thought it was just about the ugliest thing I'd seen. I wrote her a thank you note and used the quilt on my bed for a while, then it was folded up at the end of the bed, and then it went into a closet.

    About 10 years ago, I had a cat who thought my quilt frame was a hammock. To protect the quilt in progress, I grabbed my old, ugly pink and green quilt. It's a bit faded now and shows wear, but after 30 years, it looks much more attractive than it did when I was younger. I still use it to cover my work in progress, and I enjoy the idea that I am hand quilting with her.

    When I give someone a quilt, I also give up my ideas about how the quilt should be used. If they don't like it, that's too bad, and while it might hurt to think of it lining the dog's bed, it's not my quilt anymore. But if they don't say thank you, chances are good I'll never make them a quilt again.

    Janet

  9. #9
    Super Member DebraK's Avatar
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    "Wow, I can't believe you took the time to do something like this for me."

  10. #10
    Super Member joyce888's Avatar
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    I love charity crafter's response! It reminds me of a Utube video where a guy took ladies panties and made a quilt. He used only sexy panties (no Granny panites according to him) and it was hilarious! Sometimes I think we've got to look at what the quilt says of the quilter (in charity's case it does sound like it helped him work through his grief). Right now I have the same dilemma; My Mother was working on a cross-stitch quilt when she died and told me she was going to give it to me when it was finished. I got the top from my Sister a couple of months ago and it's done in dusty blue and pink - only two colors. It is so not me. The blocks are sewn together without sashing and these are preprinted blocks with the hand-quilting lines already drawn. I had every intention of dividing it and making a quilt for my Sister and I before I saw it. Now I don't know what to do with it because I know it's not my Sister's colors either.
    Joyce

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