So disappointed
#22
My family rents a cottage for one week in the summer....same week every year and we all plan on being there. The first few years we were married, my husband came with me and about the 5th year told me that he didn't think we'd be going that year (he has a very small family and my big, loud, boisterous family was more than he could tolerate for a week). I told him we'd miss him but understood his reasoning. Every year since, we've been there (sometimes the whole week, sometimes only a long weekend)....there is no other time during the year when I can stay up half the night talking with my 23 year old niece, ride the waves with my 10 year old nephew or just sit and laugh with my sisters. Go....take your boys...enjoy yourself....they need to be with your family as much as you need to be there. Sometimes, now, my husband will drive up for the day to spend it on the beach...sometimes he skips the whole event...it's his choice...
#23
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 1,341
Tell your hubby with a new job this year a vacation might be out of the question BUT after this year he needs to spend time with his family. One day at your reunion and the rest doing something with you and your kids. Soon they won't want to go and won't want to spend time with him if he won't spend time with them now.
#24
I went last fall just 3 hrs away to see my folks. My husband had a fit -wouldn't talk for several days. When he calmed down, I told him they are 82 yrs old and 3 hrs didn't use tons of gas and that even if he stays mad, I was glad I went. When the kids were little and money was tight, we used to take along instant oatmeal and fruit bars -that was our meals. The point was to see the places, not the dining out.
#25
I have the same problem every time we are going somewhere with my husband. He never went anywhere as a kid. His Dad was a tight wad who thought only of himself. Whenever we made plans for a trip myDH would say he was going. The closer it would get to leaving he would start making excuses why he couldn't go. Eventually the trip would be cancelled. (this was even with his family reunion) His sister bugged us for years to go on vacation with her. Same old excuses. We kinda argued. He told me to go without him. I hooked the camper up to my SUV and backed it into the driveway and packed it up with the 4 kids. I don't think he thought I would do it. He was so mad he left the house in the morning before we got up. We left at 5 AM. Didn't really speak to us for a few days after we got back. Finally he said he was being stupid for being mad because he told me to go. If you wait for your DH to go with you , you will never get to go anywhere. After that we often went without him. We always bug him to come. He even missed our sons wedding, in Japan because of making excuses. My daughter and I went and had a great time. GO WITHOUT HIM!
#26
I live in Ohio and my DH has family in Paintsville. It's a 5 hour drive from here, if we don't stop to eat, go to the flea market in Ashville or stop at Taco Bell in Louisa. LOL But we always stop there, not for Taco's it's just where you stop. Live is too short. Tell him your sorry that he won't be able to go, but it's important that you go and then pack your stuff and GO! And have a wonderful time. They may not be there next year.
#27
Originally Posted by Jim's Gem
I'm with quiltingcandy, try and see if just you and the boys can drive out and see your family. It would be good for all of you to get away!
#28
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Sparks, NV
Posts: 35
I am so glad to see there are strong women out there who are enjoying life and not letting someone else dictate to them what they can and can't do. I thought it was because I was raised in CA that I felt this way, but I guess there are women all over who want to enjoy their life and help their kids enjoy theirs too. Build memories with those who want to enjoy life like you do. It is too short!
#29
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 486
I think it's wonderful that you actually WANT to spend time with your extended family and hope you can make it happen.
Fortunately my dh supports visiting my parents & brothers, but as for the rest their company is a "pleasure" I prefer to avoid whenever possible.
Fortunately my dh supports visiting my parents & brothers, but as for the rest their company is a "pleasure" I prefer to avoid whenever possible.
#30
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Louisville, Kentucky
Posts: 1,915
So sorry. I try to go back home every year for our family reunion. There were four of us kids and now I am only one who goes. Family is important and I pray that, maybe, your husband will decide to not go so you can stay longer. HUGS
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08-09-2009 09:58 PM