Hoarder

I agree about having it appraised! Strongly. They will appreciate having the appraisal for insurance purposes and writing a short note about "care and feeding of a a quilt" is worth your time. And an explanation why you chose the colors, or the pattern and the love you put into it should earn you "brownie points".

charity-crafter

I think you are more trying to educate the person on the value of the quilt. I don't see your concerns as trying to dictate how it is used. Appraisals are good, because you are giving them the value for insurance purposes.

People don't understand how expensive everything is. Shoot, I've been sewing/quilting for 30 years now and I go into sticker shock sometimes at the LQS. The Walmart bed-in-a-bag for $50 has everyone spoiled. I've even bought the store ones because there is no way I can make it for cheaper.

I only give quilts to those who understand fabric quality, time involved and quilting. They don't have to know how to quilt, just appreciate that it is expensive and time consuming.

My mother was a quilter for awhile, she made really nice quilts and gave them to my brothers, who were married with children. She came home in tears one day after visiting them, they were using her quilts for grease rags in the shop. They'd wipe their greasy hands off on them while they were working, used it in the back of the truck under the tools to protect the truck bed and on the garage floor to protect the floor while changing the oil. Mom questioned them about it "Oh, it's just some old blanket."

Grace MooreLinker

Gifts are given, the receiver of the gift will be the care giver of it . The poem idea is the best if the $$'s are a worry then
it's not being gifted it in the right spirit..

ppatti1051

I make quilts for my daughters on special occasions (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.). My grandchildren each got a twin quilt when they left the crib. Now as teenagers, I have repaired the grands quilts from years of them dragging their ubies around and they asked for new quilts this year for birthdays, king size quilts no less. I told them and the mothers that as expensive as fabrics and sewing notions had become these were the last quilts until graduation and wedding present would be the very last one for them all. I have always very frankly made them know this quilt I made cannot be gotten just anywhere and with them in and out they know how much time and work goes into it. And from here I agree with Sharonb, they will either care for it or whatever.

TanyaL

Many people like to keep their finer things such as their best china, real silverware, etc. reserved and not use it for each every day meal. They like to know that when they want their meal or their home to look its very best, their china will not have chips on the plate edges, the quilts will not have rips from the pet's claws, etc. They have a difference in their everyday things and in their best things. Some people do not. Some people use their best things on a regular basis - such as when friends come for dinner or all the family comes. Others do not. Some do not want to reserve anything for a special occasion and others find no occasion more special than everyday life.

For some people to find their quilts used in the garage as oil cloths would be an example of "pearls before swine."
Apparently other people would not be bothered at all. Go figure.

urgodschild2

I never thought about getting my daughter's wedding quilt appraised when I made it 9 years ago. She did use it until they bought a Duvet. They now live in Australia and that seems to be the preference of bed coverings. When she first moved down there, I went with her and she had to use the wedding quilt because her duvet's were all packed on the slow boat to Australia. She worried over it, worried the baby would pee on it or spit up on it etc. I told her not to worry it is washable and meant to be used. Now that the duvets are there the quilt has gone back into storage. I have a feeling if I had it appraised then she would never use it because it would be so pricey.
So maybe letting some one know how much the quilt is, they may get scared and not use it for fear of spoiling the gift. I make quilts for one to love and use so I wouldn't want them to be afraid to use it because of the price. But then on the other hand.....it should be included in the home insurance in case of accidents. Sigh....you can't win or lose here so I guess I will stick to what I have always done......Just give the quilt and let them decide what they will do with it as it now belongs to them.

SouthPStitches

I haven't read all the responses here, but my first reaction is you might be walking a thin line here. You made this quilt with a ton of love and dollars. It was your choice to splurge on the gorgeous but costly batiks on a quilt this large. But no amount of money is worth possibly offending your son and future daughter-in-law. It might take the joy right out of receiving the gift and spoil your very best intentions if you put a dollar value on the quilt. They also could chose to put the quilt away, afraid to use because of something happening and that would be such a shame. If you want it appraised, that's fine, but I'd keep and produce it only if necessary due to an unforeseen catastrophy. Nothing wrong in printing something out with laundry directions and maybe including a box of color catchers. I hope I haven't offended you with my honesty.

ecmoore

When my husband and I were getting married, it was a very low-key affair. We rented a nice house, and rather than put a lot of money into disposable decorations, my husband suggested taking the money we would have spent on those and put it into the wedding quilt. It ended up being the focus piece of the wedding - we hung it from an upper balcony over the doorstep where we got married. My mom helped with it - she was the one finishing up the binding an hour before the ceremony, which makes it mean all the more.

The older ladies loved it, and still talk about it. They "get" it. They didn't ask about how much it cost, and didn't ask me to make them one.

That being said, most of the people my age (late 20's, early 30's) don't get it. They were... shocked... when they found out how much it cost, and how much I'd charge them. They don't get why I would spend that kind of money (close to a thousand dollars) and time (close to a thousand man hours, including all the steps), on a quilt. And if they don't understand, I'm not about to waste my breath. You can't make someone value something they don't.

What I suppose I'm trying to say is that some people will get it and treasure it. Others simply don't - and that's not really a bad thing, it's just a case of different priorities. I like quilts, quilting means something to me, so I made my own, and it was our gift to "us". So when I give a gift, I try to get a feel for the individual, and give a gift in line with their priorities. Normally, if someone wants a quilt for a big occasion, they start hinting about it early, and I just take the hint.

Skittl1321

I think an appraisal tucked in with the quilt is a good idea. Even if they do have great sentimental value for the quilt (and you can't guarantee that) they might not understand the actual $ value of it.

I know people I give small quilts to are constantly telling me I should sell them, and then when I tell them I couldn't make enough money for it, they are shocked. Sometimes they'll even say something like "I mean, I'd pay $50 at least for this!" and I laugh and say materials alone cost $120, not to mention time, they just have no idea.

Knowing the cost of it might make the difference of being stored in acid free paper in a climate controlled closet, vs folded and put in a plastic bag in the attic if it ever does get put away.

grammatjr

I am glad someone else said this, as I was about to put my two cents in. Often people think that it can be made CHEAP if you make it yourself. They don't understand the cost of all the supplies, the quantity of how much of those supplies goes into a quilt, etc, etc, etc. We all know what I am talking about. They also don't think of the time put into it. If they were to pay someone to make a quilt, that would be part of the equation, too.

But, all that aside - why NOT tell them what it cost to make, and how many hours you spent on it? Perhaps you think it is not cool etiquette. But, if you bought them a toaster, set of luggage, pair of curtains - anything off their registry - they would know how much you spent (or at least potentially spent, not considering discounts, coupons, sales, etc). How is a lovingly made gift/quilt different?

I agree they need to know something for insurance purposes.

Another idea if you don't want to tell exactly. Make a journal (even after the fact), make it like a diary. "today I bought the fabrics for the quilt for Bob & Sue, the color reminds me of the sea that summer we went to.........", "Well, it only took 11 hours to piece all the stars for Bob & Sue's quilt, now I need to.........","Thank God for coupons! I was able to buy the batting today for 40% off! That meant that I could buy some really expensive fabric for the back", "with each stitch of the binding, I said a prayer and dreamed of their beautiful life together"," well, it is all done - total 18 yards of fabric and batting, about 300,00 stitches, 87 hours of work - hope they like it" etc. That would let them KNOW how much went into it, and how much you loved them to be willing to do that, yet without having to tell a dollar amount.