bstanbro

One time I made a small paper-pieced project for an old friend. It was a "stained glass cross"--a very clever pattern, and I had found the perfect fabrics for it. I made the mistake of showing it to my pushy neighbor who then demanded that I make one for her. I knew she wouldn't let up, so I made a different project for her--same size and technique. I hated every minute of it and it's the one project I've ever made that I don't have a picture of. My heart simply wasn't in it.

My immediate family is small, and I did manage to get a quilt made for each person this Christmas, in addition to making a wedding quilt for my son and my new daughter-in-law. I've been quilting for about a year and a half, and with the exception of the first quilt I made, every one was given away to someone else.

Now it's the new year, and I intend to work only on projects that I want to do. I am nearly finished with the first quilt I've made specifically for myself. If anyone asks me to make a quilt for them, I plan to tell them that I have a looooooong waiting list of projects and that I'll put them on my list. Who's to know that I don't have a list!

tcarota

I don't mind making the quilts, but can't afford it and don't know how to tell them. They have no idea the cost of making a quilt!

Honey

WOW! Did this subject hit a nerve with all of us or what :?: :hunf: When I give a quilt for a special fundraiser, I do it annonomously for just this reason :thumbup: For those who know that I quilt and ask, I am very blunt about the cost and how much I would charge for my work. I learned my lesson a few years ago. I made a quilt and was showing it to a friend. She fell in love with it and asked how much I would charge for it. Being cought off guard, I told her to name the price. (BIG MISTAKE :!: :!: ) To say the least, I went in the hole with that one. Now, I quilt what I want when I want. Yes, I have quilts that I want to do for family and special events, but I no longer make promises. This is MY hobby for MY enjoyment :!: :!: I can be very generous, but only with those that I want to be.

GailG

I totally agree with you. Be stubborn. I don't mean to be insensitive. I don't mean to be stingy. I don't mean to be a "Scrooge." But lately, when someone says, "When will you make one for me?" I come back with this: "Quilts are so much fun to do. And anyone can do them. I will be happy for us to get together and I'll help you to make one for yourself." That usually nips it in the bud. I have come to the conclusion that we are enablers. The more we do for them, the more they won't do for themselves. (And the less they learn to do fun things.) And we get worn down to a frazzle, with guilt feelings about not ever being able to finish our projects. ...AND .. they don't have a clue as to the cost and time involved. My friend came along with me to buy fabric for my son's quilt. She was absolutely astonished that the fabric alone cost so much. I told her that I still had to get batting.

Now do I need an attitude adjustment or what? I just love doing things for others, but I think that the more we do, the more that is expected from us. OOH, I must really be having a bad day today.

Miss Mona

A lot of people have asked me for quilts. Some just acquaintances. What I did was tell them that if they bought the fabric I would make the quilt. Most fabric at a fabric store runs $8.00 average. I only had 1 person that bought the fabric and I made a 45 x 60. People do not realize the cost until it is pointed out to them.

Hobbyhorse1027

If someone would like to make quilted items for family, friends, or acquaintances there are many options. Placemats, potholders, coasters, wall hangings, kitchen towels, wallets, eye glass holders, totes, and purses are all lower cost options. We should only make quilts for those we choose to, not for those who has required us to. Quilting should be a labor of love not a requirement to show love.

You are all right in saying most people have no idea how much time and money goes into each quilt. Those same people who have asked for a quilt probably would not spend that amount of money on a quilt for themselves.

I wouldn't usally give gifts that cost more than $50 per person. A lap quilt could surpass that amount easily. I wouldn't be able to afford to quilt if I did that on a regular basis.

Happy New Year!

Lisa

momto4

I love quilting and I dont mind putting time into it for gifts, but we are not rich by any means. We have 4 kids and 3 are growing boys. It is hard enough to keep the pantry and fridge stocked some months!!!

I have a ton of patterns (I think we all do LOL) and I think that is a great idea to have them buy the fabric. I dont even mind figuring out the yardage for them. I just cant afford to buy enough fabric to make all the gifts!!

Someone also mentioned they only make quilts for those who appreciate them and they know will take care of them. I agree with that as well. These are not 20 dollar blankets from walmart. Time alone makes them super expensive.

I AM excited to start a quilt for my sister. She just had to throw hers away that my parents made us when we were about 5 (20+ years ago) It was just falling apart. It was made with scraps of this and that as we were very poor, but if she kept it alive that long I KNOW she is definitely worthy. :) This time it will be with quality stuff that will hopefully last her ages.

gaigai

I would have turned to her and said, "Nope, I don't love you that much." Or else, go out to walmart and buy her a cheap one made in China. I HATE people who try emotional blackmail. It will always backfire on them.

gaigai

Tell them that even if you stopped eating and sleeping and doing anything else, you wouldn't have the time or money to make a quilt for everyone who wants one from you, but that you will be glad to teach them how to make one for themselves. That ought to fix the problem.

I am constantly amazed at the people who think that they are "entitled" to someone's hard work etc. When I worked part-time for an airline, I would have complete strangers ask me for buddy passes, free trips, etc.

tucky46

I decided to count how many quilts I have made in the last 20 years....44....and I own 4 quilts and 2 wall hangings....now I added up how many quilts each of my adult children and their children have....38!!!!!...I have 4 kids and 8 grands.....I finally had the nerve to tell them last month that it is my turn to enjoy some of the quilts I have been dying to try making...ahhhh...now which one to start with is my biggest problem....