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after 56 years of marriage,having to downsize

after 56 years of marriage,having to downsize

Old 03-01-2019, 06:15 PM
  #31  
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My friend downsized & had a ton of red, white and blue & donated it to Quilts of Valor quilters. So appreciated by them because money is tight.
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Old 03-01-2019, 08:47 PM
  #32  
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Betty, I moved from Long Island to PA 2 years ago. Our previous place was home for 23 years. I started purging two years before our move so I had lots of time to really decide what was going away and what I couldn't part with. As for my fabrics, I touched each and every piece (saying goodbye, perhaps?). If it brought me no joy, it went in the donate box which grew to three large donate boxes and nearly 200 pieces of fabric no smaller than a half yard and up to 3 yards. The recipient was a local quilt guild that made and donated lap and baby quilts to a local nursing home and nearby hospital. I also gave them my beloved Rocketeer but kept my new Janome, my serger and my three featherweights. I have a sewing room in our new PA retirement home.
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Old 03-02-2019, 08:04 PM
  #33  
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I feel exactly opposite from most of you. I am 77 and I plan to live till 95. Why can't I enjoy my Mother's beautiful dishes and my fabric till I am gone. My kids feel I should get rid of everything so they don't have to do it. I want to move to a larger home so I can have a room to quilt or paint when I want to, then walk out and close the door so the items will be right where I left them. I love cherry furniture and I have antique family pieces, and I do not want to get rid of any of it. I love to work with wood and have my own wood shop out back. I plan to have another one if I move. I guess all of us have choices but I do not plan to get rid of mine. I cleaned and polished that furniture for over 56 married years and I am not ready yet. Maybe I will live to be 105, who knows.
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Old 03-02-2019, 08:46 PM
  #34  
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Originally Posted by ragamuffin View Post
I feel exactly opposite from most of you. I am 77 and I plan to live till 95. Why can't I enjoy my Mother's beautiful dishes and my fabric till I am gone. My kids feel I should get rid of everything so they don't have to do it. I want to move to a larger home so I can have a room to quilt or paint when I want to, then walk out and close the door so the items will be right where I left them. I love cherry furniture and I have antique family pieces, and I do not want to get rid of any of it. I love to work with wood and have my own wood shop out back. I plan to have another one if I move. I guess all of us have choices but I do not plan to get rid of mine. I cleaned and polished that furniture for over 56 married years and I am not ready yet. Maybe I will live to be 105, who knows.
Ragamuffin, I love you! I'm the same way. I have a lot of antiques I've inherited and accumulated on my own. I love all 5 sets of dishes that I have plus my other collections. I don't plan to get rid of it until I have to. I love my things and they all bring me joy. If you don't have to get rid of them don't! If the kids don't want to deal with it, I'm sure you can find someone else to leave an inheritance to that would be glad to do a bit of work for it.
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Old 03-03-2019, 09:38 AM
  #35  
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If you have Netflix watch the Marie Kondo Show. I think you will be inspired to start letting go of some of this.
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Old 03-03-2019, 10:34 AM
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Being the one who had to clean out two great aunts homes that neither one had moved in 60 years I can understand how children want parents to not leave a houseful of stuff. No way I'd want my kids to have the last memory of me as having to deal with mom's stuff.
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Old 03-03-2019, 10:48 AM
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Originally Posted by luvstoquilt301 View Post
If you have Netflix watch the Marie Kondo Show. I think you will be inspired to start letting go of some of this.
I think that's the problem. I'm not sure why I would want to let go of things that I love and that bring me joy.
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Old 03-05-2019, 10:35 AM
  #38  
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Originally Posted by Onebyone View Post
Being the one who had to clean out two great aunts homes that neither one had moved in 60 years I can understand how children want parents to not leave a houseful of stuff. No way I'd want my kids to have the last memory of me as having to deal with mom's stuff.
I wouldn't want my kids to have to clean it out, but aren't there services who'll come in and take care of it? I tend to want to keep all the stuff that brings me joy. That said - it is important to weed the garden once in a while. I wonder what my sis-in-law would say - she took care of at least 2 estates before her own parents went.

I wish you a lot of luck with your downsizing and your move - it can be a tough job, but one with big rewards at the end!

Last edited by JoyjoyMarie; 03-05-2019 at 10:37 AM. Reason: additional thoughts
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Old 03-05-2019, 11:06 AM
  #39  
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Originally Posted by ragamuffin View Post
I feel exactly opposite from most of you. I am 77 and I plan to live till 95. Why can't I enjoy my Mother's beautiful dishes and my fabric till I am gone. My kids feel I should get rid of everything so they don't have to do it. I want to move to a larger home so I can have a room to quilt or paint when I want to, then walk out and close the door so the items will be right where I left them. I love cherry furniture and I have antique family pieces, and I do not want to get rid of any of it. I love to work with wood and have my own wood shop out back. I plan to have another one if I move. I guess all of us have choices but I do not plan to get rid of mine. I cleaned and polished that furniture for over 56 married years and I am not ready yet. Maybe I will live to be 105, who knows.
I don't think there is a right or wrong way. Your way suits you just fine. You can manage, you are not overwhelmed with your dishes, furniture and fabric, can take care of them, etc. So that's what you should do. I am not a stash person. All that a lovely fabric can live in various quilt shops til I need it. We purged by desire when we moved from a smaller house to a bigger one. Yes, we go in reverse. There were a lot of things we didn't want anymore. Never miss them. Everyone has a different way to approach these things.
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Old 03-06-2019, 10:09 AM
  #40  
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I just posted a new thread of hiring a declutterer, then I saw this thread.

My house is about 1800sq/f with 1200 up and 800 down. I plan in the next couple years to gut the lower level, update the wiring and plumbing, plumb it for a kitchen, update the bathroom and use it for a large sewing space. In time I will convert it into a rental suite. As I age, I may move downstairs and rent out the upstairs to give me an income source and allow me to stay in my home longer.

I have a Mid Arm on a frame, it has its own room at the moment. I plan to redo my sewing room which right now has a variety of furniture pieces that work, but I would like to have something more cohesive and attractive.

My brother and I are dealing with my Dad's property. He has been hoarding there for 40 years. My brother tends to put his head in the sand and ignore the problem, then all of a sudden decide we must do something, then back down on his word. It is frustrating as Dad's place is actually in a trust with my brother and I the beneficiaries. It is also a 1/2 day travel from my home. A month ago we walked through the house and talked about what if anything we wanted from it.

I recently got in touch with someone with big bins who can help, passed the info on to my brother and he appears to have dropped the ball again. Two years ago I got the information needed to upgrade the electrical passed it on to my brother and he dropped the ball. He recently asked for it again, I sent him the email from 2 years ago, I was not going to call to update the costs involved. Brother has POA, so he has to be the one authorizing expenses.
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