How would you want someone to react?
12-30-2011, 03:51 PM
#131
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: So. Fla now, Va orig
Posts: 1,565
Cheers to all of you who say that the "gift" no matter what, is the "thought" that, that person cared enough to present a gift to you. As a designer I must tell you that quilts DO NOT HAVE TO MATCH ANYTHING, as they are really in the realm of art. Many of us get so caught up in the matchy matchy that we feel it is a mistake if it doesn't match, or co-ordinate. I once had a client who was a master quilter, when we designed her home each of the bedrooms was its own unique room because of her beautiful quilts. They were all hand done and I have never seen any quilts as beautiful even at shows, and NO none of them matched the overall color scheme. I hope this comment will liberate some of you from self imposed rules to match everything. For those of us who have given gifts that never show up again in the household take heart most of us have experienced this at one time or another. When that happens to me I make a mental note not to err in that realm again. Can you imagine giving a gift of 4 waterford crystal vases with porcelain flowers (a limited edition of which each sold for $115 to $ 130) and getting a lukewarm thanks and then NEVER seeing those items again? It happened to me, but as I tell my husband, once you give a gift, it is no longer yours and the recipient has the ultimate decision over what and how, etc they will handle that gift. Have a happy New Year!! 
12-30-2011, 05:09 PM
#133
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Bosque County, Texas
Posts: 2,709
Cheers to all of you who say that the "gift" no matter what, is the "thought" that, that person cared enough to present a gift to you. As a designer I must tell you that quilts DO NOT HAVE TO MATCH ANYTHING, as they are really in the realm of art. Many of us get so caught up in the matchy matchy that we feel it is a mistake if it doesn't match, or co-ordinate. I once had a client who was a master quilter, when we designed her home each of the bedrooms was its own unique room because of her beautiful quilts. They were all hand done and I have never seen any quilts as beautiful even at shows, and NO none of them matched the overall color scheme. I hope this comment will liberate some of you from self imposed rules to match everything. For those of us who have given gifts that never show up again in the household take heart most of us have experienced this at one time or another. When that happens to me I make a mental note not to err in that realm again. Can you imagine giving a gift of 4 waterford crystal vases with porcelain flowers (a limited edition of which each sold for $115 to $ 130) and getting a lukewarm thanks and then NEVER seeing those items again? It happened to me, but as I tell my husband, once you give a gift, it is no longer yours and the recipient has the ultimate decision over what and how, etc they will handle that gift. Have a happy New Year!!
12-30-2011, 05:37 PM
#134
Super Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Bucks co PA
Posts: 1,269
my mother doesn't like the quilt i made her. She tells me its too heavy. She has it in a plastic tub last time i saw it. and my dil put the quilt I made her in the bottom of the dogs cage. So how blunt could she be telling me she didnt' like it. Did it hurt my feelings? Well yes and ya know I just won't make them another one.
12-30-2011, 06:15 PM
#135
Super Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Southern Idaho
Posts: 1,171
I would love it because I've only gotten one wall hanging in my life and it was from someone on this board. And I treasure it with all my heart and will never forget what she did for me. Plus I gained a really good friend. I'm the one that always seems to be giving. I love giving, but I could not hide one or not apprediate it if someone gave me one. No matter what color etc., it would keep me warm in the winter and keep me warm in my heart. I would display it proudly that someone thought enough of me to give me something that they worked hard on and it was a gift from their heart. Maybe some people have too many things to be able to appreciate that. Just saying.
I was wondering after reading the post on people not appreciating the quilts we make. I know the hard work, creativity, and joy that goes into making my quilts and to give it to someone who just doesn't respond is very disappointing. But I was wondering....what if someone made me a quilt that was all the wrong colors or design for me. How would I react??? Of course I would be very appreciated because I know the work involved and also how nice of them to think of me. But I realized that I probably would put it in the closet and not look at it again. That is really not appreciating the gift. So I was wondering if there is a way for a person to tell the giver in a kind way that they don't like the colors or it is not their style and it would be better to give it to someone else who would really appreciate it. But also to be able to tell the giver that they like certain colors, quiet colors, not flowery things, or whatever their taste. I think that some people are also thinking how can this fit into the decor of their own home and that may be a reason that they act blah about the gift. I have decided that because of this post and how people have responded to it that I might be asking people about their preferences in regards to colors, etc.
So what I was wondering was......if you received a quilt that you just could not stand colors or designs, how would your respond and what would you do with the quilt after you got it?????
So what I was wondering was......if you received a quilt that you just could not stand colors or designs, how would your respond and what would you do with the quilt after you got it?????
12-30-2011, 06:42 PM
#136
Super Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Petersburg, WV
Posts: 1,512
Whether it is the right colors or not, whether it is the right design or not; the whole point is they were thinking of you when they made it or not. But it was therapeutic for them to make it. Accept it with the grace it was given to you and then find a charity away from that person to give it to and write it off on your taxes if you want. But really, make them feel good, they may need it. Then proclaim how I do not have enough room for any more quilts if they decide to give you another down the road, but oh well.
12-30-2011, 09:50 PM
#138
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Northern CA
Posts: 422
Yes, I agree. I have done that. I surprised a friend with a table runner that I had made, everyone who saw it raved about how beautiful it was. It was the prettiest one I had made at the time. The receiver was polite & also said it was beautiful, but the way she looked at it I knew she was thinking the same thing you were saying "but this doesn't fit in my decor...", although she also said "earth colors are my colors..." I realized it, so I helped her out by telling her that she can use it in any room that she wishes, to cover a dresser or whatever; and that it doesn't have to be in the dining room or living room. She called me later & told me that it's on top of her dresser, and it looks beautiful there (I don't know whether or not it really was or how long it's going to be there). You'd have to trust them with it.
I have made one for a niece, but I had her go with me to choose the fabrics herself. I also make the tissue covers for gifts. I just have them choose from the ones that I already made. It's very disappointing that the work you put into something is not appreciated.
I have made one for a niece, but I had her go with me to choose the fabrics herself. I also make the tissue covers for gifts. I just have them choose from the ones that I already made. It's very disappointing that the work you put into something is not appreciated.
Last edited by T.; 12-30-2011 at 09:53 PM.
12-31-2011, 12:09 AM
#139
Super Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Washington
Posts: 4,001
That is called tact, quiltsRfun, I agree with you. I don't know what it hurts to keep and love something someone made or gave you, maybe we shouldn't be so picky. Maybe we could learn to love different colors, etc. If anyone ever gave me a quilt I would be thrilled to death. Maybe I say this because we never had much growing up and for someone to gift us something like that means a whole bunch to me.
I agree. Having been on the receiving end of gifts that were returned, I can tell you that it hurts no matter how tactfully it's done. Smile, say thank you and give an honest complement on color, fabric choices or the time and love that went into the quilt. I have a quilt on my bed right now that's not exactly what I was hoping for but I know the person who made it struggled with each stitch since she has severe arthritis. Seeing that quilt reminds me of the love she put into it.
12-31-2011, 01:30 AM
#140
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 1,087
Thanks for all the posts in this thread, I am waiting to hear if my niece likes her quilt I posted to her. If she doesn't, I want it back I liked it. Her mother is not allowed to have it, she gave the last quilt to the dog to sleep on, then buried the dog in it!
I liked it. Her mother is not allowed to have it, she gave the last quilt to the dog to sleep on, then buried the dog in it!
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
bearisgray
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
162
10-09-2011 07:41 AM
ginnie6
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
128
03-03-2011 03:23 AM
