Wish I had asked Mum

Old 10-21-2010, 09:55 AM
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Now I have questions about my Grandma that I wished I'd had sense enough to ask when she was living. I saw a picture of her and her mother in the late 1800s at the age of 7. Her mother died shortly after. They were both dressed in high middle class dresses, yet she wound up the wife of a poor, hard scrabble farmer, probably illiterate...no, I have no idea of what his education was..but his brothers were politicians and business men. Sure do wish I knew lots of answers, but all of them were buried decades ago.

Now I'm going to add often to the diary I'm keeping for my kids and Grands to enjoy now or later. Maybe it will make up for what I've not had the time or chance to tell them when we do meet.
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Old 10-21-2010, 10:07 AM
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sometimes if a family secret causes you to get upset it is one that is better left to continue to be a secret! Since you do not really seem to understand all that was involved, tho it is hard, I suggest you try to forget and let it go! Beleive me I know family secrets, and I decided it was best to end with me!!
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Old 10-21-2010, 02:00 PM
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My mom had 12 kids so I never really got to know my mom, but was raised by my 6 older sisters. Now that I am an adult, I have adopted my next door neighbor as my mom because she listens and gives good advice.
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Old 10-21-2010, 08:45 PM
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So many times I want to pick up the phone, just to hear her voice. She is gone 2 yrs. now.
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Old 10-21-2010, 09:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee
So many times I want to pick up the phone, just to hear her voice. She is gone 2 yrs. now.
me too
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Old 10-21-2010, 11:05 PM
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All the time everyday. My mama passed away now 5 yrs ago this October. One of the hardest things for me is when my two 5 year old girls ask where their grandmother is. They never knew her but are keenly aware that other kids have grandparents. I have a hard time at the store seeing grandmother's, mothers and the grandchildren. My mother loved my children as much as I did and would have given anything for them. What a big loss for them to not have her.
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Old 10-22-2010, 07:16 AM
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Kay Carlson, my parents were also from the UP. They were married in 1931. I always enjoyed the stories about life up there. My fave recipe or two...Bernies Hot Fudge Sauce and pasties.
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Old 10-22-2010, 09:44 AM
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was rather moved to read these; my Mother died when I was 3 1/2, THEN CHILDREN WERE NOT TOLD ,so at 6/7 realised that it was true reading between the lines, there are SO many questions I have as my maternal G/parents were so upset at the mention of her name that I grew to keep quiet.

DON'T keep the kids in the dark and keep the subject ,however sad, in the open.
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Old 10-22-2010, 01:17 PM
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For me, it's my dad. I was 23 when my dad died and it'll be 4 years next year. I had my daughter the year after he passed away. My dad's birthday is Nov 9th, and I miss him so much. I was such a Daddy's girl, and I still talk to him every day. I wish I knew more about him.. he was 60 when he died. I had gone to England to visit my husband for a week and when I got back to the States Dad was in a coma and he never came out of it.

I still have his last voicemail to me on my cell phone. I can't delete it. It's also saved on CD, and memory card and on my computer. Somedays I just want to hear his voice and get a hug. That's when I listen to it.
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Old 10-22-2010, 01:22 PM
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This topic touches my heart and soul... and brings me tears of joy and memories. My father has been gone since 1977 and my mother since 1985. Not a day goes by without my thinking of them. I must say that I am a dreamer... and I do get to see and spend time with one or both in my sleep. Often, I wake up and remember vividly what transpired during my sleep. Other times I awake frustrated that I can't remember... but comforted because I know we were together.

I was in my mid twenties when my mom became sick and she only lasted a year after her diagnosis with cancer. I wish I had talked to her about her illness, her fears, her hopes, her dreams and her prayers. I wish I could have encouraged her to talk about her feelings and maybe it would have comforted us both. Today, I have tremendous faith and wish I had, at the time, been able to share with her my belief that she was really about to start a new beginning rather than an ending.
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