Quilt as a Gift
#101
Originally Posted by sss
Has anyone ever given a quilt as a gift to someone and after giving the quilt gift you hardly get a thank you? I just don't think people realize the time, work, thought and worry that you put into each quilt you do, especially when it is for someone you think is going to love it. I just finished a retirement quilt for a friend who I work with. We have worked together for 10 yrs. Her thank you to me was, "Your quilt was a big hit!"
Any thoughts on this? I know I should not be upset but I am.
Any thoughts on this? I know I should not be upset but I am.
I'm positive that your quilt is loved and treasured and that perhaps the recipient honestly doesn't know how to show it adequately. That is often the case. It's also possible that they have no clue the amount of time, effort and love that went into the creation of your lovely quilt. You made it out of love and generosity so please feel good about that. Assume the quilt is loved, treasured, and honored and don't dwell on it. Some people honestly can't and don't make a fuss over gifts as they are uncomfortable doing so. My inlaws are very conservative that way but due their being so conservative with their appreciation, I don't want to make anything for them. My kids, on the other hand, make a big deal over my quilts and I know beyond a doubt they are loved, treasured and wear out but they are used and they tell me that every time they wrap up in one of my quilts, they feel my love and that's how it should be.
#102
Originally Posted by MamaBear61
This has happened to many of us. Unless the receiver is a quilter or at least a crafter they probably don't get it.
#103
This same subject is always discussed regarding cross stitch, which I used to do a lot of! Personalized samplers made with the couples name and wedding date. Framing those can cost lots of money too, hundreds for larger pieces. I know today's world is a lot of matchy-matchy, then toss it all when the theme is changed.
I also read a comment once about those who lived thru the depression always had handmade, so store-bought was a huge, special thing! Everyone is different. It just makes me try to me more expressive in my response when I receive something.
I also read a comment once about those who lived thru the depression always had handmade, so store-bought was a huge, special thing! Everyone is different. It just makes me try to me more expressive in my response when I receive something.
#104
Originally Posted by gingerella
It's worse when it's your daughter. I promised myself no more quilts for her - I find them on the floor- being walked on, hanging up to cover the window when the room was being painted, etc.
But then, last year she asked me for one I was making and I can't refuse. So yes, she has two more. At least I find them (or one of them) on her bed once in a while.
But then, last year she asked me for one I was making and I can't refuse. So yes, she has two more. At least I find them (or one of them) on her bed once in a while.
My daughter in law loves and treasures my quilts so much that they are rarely used. She truly does love and treasure them and doesn't want them to wear out. Bless her heart. She and my daughter actually had quite a heated argument one day over who loves and treasures my quilts more and I had to intervene between these two best friends. It's wonderful that she treasures my quilts but my daughters children are growing up wrapped in grammy's love every single day while her children see the "don't touch quilts as we have to keep them pretty because Grammy put so much hard work into them." It's a tough call, you know. My daughter's family's quilts will wear out and my son's children will have their quilts looking like new. I have very mixed feelings about it. I love that she treasures my "heirlooms" so much that she wants to preserve them but the bond I have with my daughter's 4 children is so amazing and I know a huge part of it is the love they feel using my quilts daily. Each grandchild came home from the hospital wrapped in a hand quilted Grammy quilt.
#105
Originally Posted by hazeljane
I look at it as the gift was my time and thoughts. And because it is a gift, I can let go when I give it. I made my husband's two grandbabies quilts, and I am just starting to get to know his kids. (His ex-wife has made sure it's not comfortable for ANYONE to be friendly with me) My husband took them when he went to visit at Easter. They were a huge hit with the girls, and his daughter in law thanked him to pass along to me, but that's it. And you know, I'd make them quilts again, because it is not about the thanks I get, it is about the joy I feel in making them and giving them love.
I understand why people are hurt, but for me, it's part of letting go as I get older.I don't take on other people's rudeness or let it affect my actions. Life is too short to feel that kind of resentment. If my quilts get used, I'm happy.
I understand why people are hurt, but for me, it's part of letting go as I get older.I don't take on other people's rudeness or let it affect my actions. Life is too short to feel that kind of resentment. If my quilts get used, I'm happy.
You make the quilt with love, you give it with love and although you may never know for sure, I bet those quilts are all very loved and treasured. One thing about it, the quilts given to my son's family will be known by a future generation and that's not a bad thing either.
#107
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 82
my daughters want my quilts and i said o k but you need to help me on the first one . the first said i didn't know how hard this is!!!to me it's not hard but fun (when i'm in the mood to quilt)but i think the experience will make them more grateful
#108
Originally Posted by Mamagus
I give my quilts to people I LIKE. It is my way of saying, "Here, I like you so you have the great honour of one of quilts being in your life. Cherish it or chuck it, it is yours and I am happy to have made it for you."
Now having said that DH keeps asking me to make a quilt for his daughter. She is thirty, has a great job and lives in another province and has never in the 6 years I have known him, sent him a birthday card, Father's Day card, Christmas card and of course never a gift either... so let me tell you I don't LIKE the selfish little %&!@* (rhymes with witch). She's on my list but I am hoping he forgets he has ever mentioned it!
I am making a lap quilt for a friend who is retiring from my old school, and I LIKE her. That's enough for me.
Now having said that DH keeps asking me to make a quilt for his daughter. She is thirty, has a great job and lives in another province and has never in the 6 years I have known him, sent him a birthday card, Father's Day card, Christmas card and of course never a gift either... so let me tell you I don't LIKE the selfish little %&!@* (rhymes with witch). She's on my list but I am hoping he forgets he has ever mentioned it!
I am making a lap quilt for a friend who is retiring from my old school, and I LIKE her. That's enough for me.
#109
Originally Posted by joan gaddis
my daughters want my quilts and i said o k but you need to help me on the first one . the first said i didn't know how hard this is!!!to me it's not hard but fun (when i'm in the mood to quilt)but i think the experience will make them more grateful
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